Welcoming Spirit

Happiness Project: Energy: Lists and Tackling a Nagging Task

2012-01-26T06:00:00.000-08:00

Since I'm taking queues from Gretchen Rubin's book "The Happiness Project," I knew I'd need to address a few of my "nagging tasks" this month. Those are the things that sit in the back of your mind, you know you need to do them, but honestly, they are no fun and who the heck wants to do them, anyway? I'd rather sit down and watch Martha Stewart, instead. (who ironically probably already has her nagging tasks complete, done perfectly, and announced in a press release on personalized stationery.)

Here's what my list looks like, usually on multiple sticky notes and scattered around in my purse, stuck to a notebook, sometimes in my pocket. I get the urge to write these things down but then I don't really end up doing them.

Well, enter my list tool - Cozi Calendar. I started using it this month and it's been awesome.

For this part of my project, I did a brain dump of all those that have been lingering in my mind, and on random sticky notes, in a single place at Cozi.

This isn't life changing, "bucket list," I-want-to-visit-The-Great-Wall type stuff. This is the nagging-stuff-that -never-gets-done kind of list. Now that it's all in one place, and a place that's always accessible, I find myself using spare moments to get these things done. I pull them up at my desk, or on my iPhone, and get 'er done.

We ordered the mattress and a new platform bed (already crossed off, so it didn't make the stickies above). I've already found a well reviewed dermatologist, I just need to make the appointment. As soon as I decided WHO I wanted to see, I added that number to my Cozi post, so it's accessible.

What tips do you have for keeping yourself accountable for these nagging kinds of tasks?

Might be a nagging task, I just haven't added it on Cozi yet

Getting those nagging tasks done,
Paula

Podcast Review: Bethel Church: A Lesson From My Dad

2012-01-25T13:21:00.000-08:00

In my daily commuting I like to listen to podcasts. This one, from Bill Johnson at Bethel Church, blew me away. The life stories and the history of the Bay Area are a great listen. Bill's clear understanding and sense of purpose is inspiring. Truly, being an example in all ways, planting the seed for others, his message is so close to my heart. It is my wish to learn to be more mindful about how to place these inspiring seeds for others, without being pushy, without any expectation, but with the knowledge that someday someone may remember a small thing that was said, a little act, and feel and understand the love that was presented in that moment.

Please, go take a listen to Bill Johnson's "A Lesson From My Dad."

Happiness Project: Energy: Living it With Routines

2012-01-24T06:00:00.000-08:00

I've been trying my hardest to live my Energy month as "high energy" as I can. Here's some of what I do each day, many of which are routines that make good sense for anyone, really. I've just been trying my hardest to keep them in practice.

Source: Etsy via Pinterest

At night:
- set the coffee maker to automatically go off at 6am (seriously, I wake up most mornings with the jingle of "The best part of waking up...." in my head when I smell that coffee)
- pick out an outfit, down to shoes and jewelry, and pick a sweater/cardigan as well
- plug in my phone so it's charged and ready for the next day
- wipe down the kitchen, putting the dishes in the dishwasher, starting the dishwasher if it's full
- do a quick clean up of the living room (key thing here is putting away Zoom's toys)
- do one of the Flylady Flight Plan items or de-clutter an area
- think about lunch for the next day, do I have something I need to pack up?
- read in bed for a few minutes to slow down from the day
- get to bed by 10pm

In the morning:
- Shower, dry hair, eat, get out the door
- If I'm taking Zoom to school, I get him out of the house as well
- check Waze (iPhone app) before hitting the road to see what route is best
- load a podcast before leaving the driveway so I have something interesting to listen to (Joyce Meier is a standard favorite, she has a new podcast each day)

During the day at work:
- Pull up my Cozi To Do list, so if I have time at lunch or between meetings I can tackle a personal task
- Log in to Weight Watchers, knowing that I'm more likely to log my points and pay attention to what I'm eating if it's already on my screen
- drink water
- eat lunch and have a fruit snack at some point
- go weigh in on the scale in the work gym

What kinds of habits have you developed to keep yourself on task?

Having the Best Year Ever,
Paula

Happiness Project: Life Lessons, My List of the "Secrets of Adulthood"

2012-01-20T06:00:00.000-08:00

As part of the Happiness Project, I've been thinking about some my favorite "life lessons." Here they are, true, funny, real...and here I am, dancing in my front yard to celebrate :)

Read the instructions all the way through before you start
Measure twice, cut once
Speak your mind, even if your lips tremble
Don't rescue anyone who isn't asking for help, and if you do, don't expect them to thank you for your "help"
Work with and for people you respect and who respect you
Don't drink beer through a straw
If you're not sure if you need it or will use it, don't buy it
Call your parents, and listen to them. You need each other.
Re-read books that you have loved to remember why you loved them
When it looks like you might be headed towards a fight with someone, ask yourself if it's better to be right, or happy?
Look for ways to be better, not bitter
Take the time to hem your pants, and buy a sewing machine if you don't have one
Stop taking yourself so seriously
Cherish and take time to remember those people who have passed away, and think of how they inspire you
Listen to your gut reactions about people, places, and events
Let people fail, let yourself fail - it means you are learning
Tell people you love them

Memorize and internalize the Prayer of Saint Francis
Practice Centering Prayer
Follow your passions
Treat everyone the way you would like to be treated
Take chances
Love un-apologetically
Relationships work when both people look for ways to make them work
Pack a pair of undies in your carry on, along with saline, a swimsuit, glasses, a snack, and a book
Instead of feeling sorry for yourself or feeling alone, plan something with and for your friends
Pa always says "Money on the barrel" - don't live in debt, and save for the things you want

Do you have any great tid-bits to share? Please spill the beans!

Dancing the night away,
Paula

Happiness Project: Energy: Sleep and a New Bed

2012-01-19T06:00:00.000-08:00

One of the primary things I identified in my "Energy" month is sleep. There are a couple of aspects of sleep that I wanted to tackle; both the amount of sleep I get and the quality of sleep I have been getting.

Source: thedesigninspiration.com via Elaine on Pinterest

So the first trick has been attempting to get to bed by about 10pm each night. This is not easy for me. I try super hard to limit my time online, or watching TV, or even doing chores and pick up. But with a 16 month old in the house, evening quickly becomes the only time that I can take either enjoy a little "me time" or take care of stuff that just needs to get done.

I picked 10pm for a couple of reasons. During the week, I need to be up by about 6:30am to get to work on time. And on the weekends (well really every day), young Zoom often wakes up by 7am. With a little buffer time in there, it means I CAN get 8 hours of sleep.

The other issue at our house is our bed. Egads. The queen size mattress we currently have is almost TWELVE years old. No joke, I wake up multiple times a night with my arms and legs tingling, and often wake up with any number of odd pains. It's terrible. So terrible, in fact, that we have moved into the guest room and are sleeping on a futon.

That's about to come to an end. We are going to be buying a new mattress this week, and will be getting a new platform bed! Last week we went and checked out the Savvy Rest organic, all natural latex mattress and it is amazing.

Golf Ball Art for Toddlers

2012-01-17T06:00:00.000-08:00

Zoom and I did a little art project today. We used golf balls and finger paint and created some pretty cool paintings.

For supplies, we used finger paint in primary colors, a box leftover from Christmas gifts, and paper. I cut the box so that it acted like a tray to hold the paper.

We used some paper bowls to coat the golf balls with paint.

And then Zoom picked which colors to use, and we dropped in the box, and let 'em roll!

He held one side of the box, and I held the other. We laughed as we raised the sides and made the ball roll around. We also talked about what color we were using, and talked about putting the ball "in" and taking it "out" of the box.

We finished four before it was time for dinner!

What fun projects have you tackled this week?

Paula

Whoever is Happy Will Make Others Happy, too

2012-01-11T06:00:00.000-08:00

"Whoever is happy will make others happy too. He who has courage and faith will never perish in misery."

-Anne Frank

This last week I've been thinking a lot about the word "courage." One of the roots of this word, and a term that has been rattling in my head, much like a song, is the original latin for the word, which is "Corragio." It sounds Italian, and worldly, and like something I'd like to yell as I go in to proverbial battle or a painful meeting. It means, "heart," or "one's innermost feelings."

I like that the root of the word courage is tied to something beyond muscle or physical strength. It's a historical acknowledgement that the hardest things, the things that cause anguish and late nights and tear-filled conversations are the ones that take corragio. We bolster our heart, we hang on to faith, we dig deep when we tap in to courage.

It strikes me that the great teachers, those the most mature in spirit, they are the ones that teach great courage. Anne Frank, though faced with the Halocaust, of an uncertain fate for herself and her family, spread a message of love, of the courage to be happy. The courage to love when others bring discord. The courage to respond peacefully when faced with unrest. This is what each of us is called to do, to listen to the language of our heart, to listen to corragio.

Go with courage today :)
Paula

Happiness Project: 12 Topics To Tackle

2012-01-09T15:22:00.000-08:00

Happiness can be found on the beach :)

While the title of this post sounds a bit like it's a bit like a project manager's rendition of "12 days of Christmas," I had a little something different in mind. As Gretchen Rubin decided to do in her own Happiness Project, I am going to assign a topic for each month of the year. I took a little time to reflect on those things that are most important to me, and here's my list. I still need to figure out what order these go in :) and make sure they are the twelve that I want to commit to spending time with.

Energy (January)

Spirit

Love
Money / Finances
Family
Creativity
Profession
Learning / Mind
Home
Body
Order
Celebrate

For each month, my plan is to post about a handful of things that I'm focusing on around the month's topic. I realize I can't tackle everything, so I'll probably limit it to four or five things. Stuff that is important, that may make a difference in my life.

For example, in January, I'm planning on focusing on the following items in the Energy category, with the idea being that each of these things will allow me to feel more energetic each day:

Sleep, and getting a new bed

Eating Right

Exercising

Speaking my mind

Lists

Decluttering

Tackling tasks that have been dragging on far too long

Scheduling a vacation

What do you do to feel energized? Any suggestions?

Sending you all happy thoughts,

Paula

Cathedral of Christ the Light in Oakland, California

2012-01-06T13:16:00.000-08:00

Hi friends! Last week I had a couple of days off, and took a trip over to Oakland to visit the Cathedral of Christ the Light. The outside of the building is wrapped in glass, and sits near Lake Merritt. The glass and sky meld together, meshing the limits of Heaven and Earth. I had my camera with me and took a few pictures, although, I'll admit, pictures can't capture the amazingness of this place.

From the moment I stepped through the doors, I was taken by the symbolism and presence that filled the place. And the sense that God was there, hovering, welcoming, surrounding me.

The first thing one sees as they enter the wooden double doors is the large bubbling baptismal font. Past that is the interior of the church which is a symphony of glass framed in wood. Light appropriately fills the space. Below my feet was the passage of Genesis 1:2-3 engraved in the floor around the large font. I walked over the passage as I read it.

"the Spirit of God was moving over the surface of the waters. Then God said, “Let there be light.”

I loved how the dark waters and sparkling light gave me a deep sense of The Creation. I could see the symbolism of the water used here, that first act of God's Creation virtually dancing together with the act of by John baptising Jesus. Water and light. Creation and Christ. I stared at the bubbling watery void and imagined the Spirit of God moving over a vast sea of water before there was light or land.

The creation passage continues to play out in the architecture of the space, as does the marriage of Old Testament and New Testament in imagery and message. I was drawn into the space by the light, the light of the sun cascading through the huge ark-like dome that makes up the "ceiling." And, led by the light of Christ, whose image sits above the altar. The image itself, called the "Omega Window" stands 58 feet tall, and is made of 94,000 preforations through metal. The light of the sun illuminates the light of Christ for this amazing image, again marrying Creation and Christ in a moving way. The outdoor shadows change the lighting of the image constantly, breathing life into it.

As I looked straight up from this same point, I was taken by the architecture. The vast ark-like wooden beams, coupled with the triangular panels, resonated with the story of Noah, and at the same time, symbolism of the Trinity.

This photo is taken standing in front of the altar, looking back towards the entrance.

And here is Jesus on the cross which sits below the Omega Window on the altar.

Everything about this building and its design is inspiring. The attention to details, the inherent resonance with scripture, and the overwhelming sense of God fills the space; each was mind blowing to me. The lines of the building constantly lead the eye towards the Heavens, yet at the same time the materials used to build the space are simple, modern, clean. I love this Cathedral, and have a hard time finding words for how completely breath-taking it is.

If you'd like to visit or learn more, this stunning building was written up in Arch Daily (an architecture site). You can also visit the Cathedral of Chris the Light in Oakland's website to find out about taking a tour or attending mass.

Feeling inspired by humanity's tribute to the Holy,

Paula

Happiness Project 2012: The 'Beginning' - Energy

2012-01-03T15:06:00.000-08:00

Completely by chance, as I was wandering a bookstore recently, I found the book "The Happiness Project" by Gretch Rubin I remembered that my friend Chrissy had mentioned this book once, so I picked it up and began looking it over. Wow, this is just what I "needed!" it's a book about one woman's journey to find happiness. She decided to take a year to do it.

So that's what I want, too. I feel like my weight loss that started in September was the beginning of this journey, I just didn't know what the next steps were. I really wanted to find me, the adult me, the one who is in charge, who has things "planned" instead of feeling like I'm constantly reacting to the whims of others. I want our little family to have a firm foundation, some routines, some traditions, some time for just unplanned / unscripted fun.

While happiness can come out of unscriptedness, I don't think that living an unplanned life (for me) can result in happiness and fulfillment. It's too easy to get caught up in everything else, doing things for everyone else, so that at the end of a day or a month of a year, you step back and wonder ... where did all that time go?

It's like the first time Sean and I went to Hawaii. He said he'd never been because there just wasn't enough money. To which I said - if you plan, and save, and put the money aside, you will have enough. It's a matter of making things a priority. Happiness is a priority, but I don't think enough of us make time for it. Happiness doesn't just happen, you have to make it happen.

Now I feel like I have some ideas of what the next, real, tangible steps will be. For right now, I'm going to make "Energy" might focus for this month. Gretchen Rubin broke her year up into 12 areas of focus, so I am going to follow that lead. Energy was also her first area to work on, and I can see that it makes sense for me to start there, too. I'm going to be working on more lists and ideas, too.

What makes you happy? What can you do more of to make you happy this year?

Let's get happy,
Paula

The Happiness Project begins!

How to Make a Star Wars Sweatshirt for a Toddler

2012-01-02T23:55:00.000-08:00

A few years ago, I fell for the super nerdy "Spaceships Tee" from Super 7. It has a bunch of different spaceships on it, and it was only made in men's sizes. Here I am with it:

Perhaps you realize the error of my ways. Male nerds are drawn to this shirt, and the cool pictures are plastered all over, well, my chest. After a long day of awkward interactions, I sadly put it away for good.

And then I realized that while I'd never wear the shirt again, I could make something with it for Zoom by cutting up the pattern on the t-shirt. I envisioned a super awesome toddler Star Wars Sweatshirt. Here's what I did!

I grabbed Zoom's black 18 month size Circo (from Target) hoodie. This was $8.

I cut my beloved shirt, taking part of the pattern, being sure to get the recognize-able AT-AT Walker and X-Wing Fighter:

I pinned the cut outs on to the sweatshirt to make sure I had them just where I wanted them before sewing:

I sewed the t-shirt pieces on to the sweatshirt with black thread using my sewing machine. There's no need for a hem or finishing as jersey doesn't fray, and I liked the idea that it will curl a bit and look more "street" after Zoom wears it a bit:

And here's the pocket detail:

Love the Light

2011-12-28T13:55:00.000-08:00

“I will love the light for it shows me the way. Yet I will endure the darkness for it shows me the stars.” – Og Mandino

December 19: A Paper Nativity Scene

2011-12-19T10:36:00.000-08:00

Day 19: A simple paper manger made with my hands reminds me of the humble beginnings the most profound gift the world has ever received

Didier, a French artist, has a wonderful blog called "My Little House." And he posts all sorts of amazing Christian art and paper models for children (and others) to make. I fell in love with his art, the blog's name, and the generiousity of his spirit with these simple gifts.

Here's the Nativity Scene, along with the entire town of Bethlehem:

A paper model of Bethlehem, from Didier at "My Little House"

I love this. I love paper, I love the simplicity of the town, and I love that an artist took the time to make and share these with the world. I can imagine as Zoom gets older that we might make this town, one week at a time, as we get closer to Christmas Eve. It would be such a great opportunity to talk about this story, read the Bible together, and learn about the history of Israel.

December 18: I am the 2nd Biggest Loser, It's Official

2011-12-18T14:35:00.000-08:00

Day 18: 3 months of hard work pays off and my losing ways are recognized by more than just my scale at home

Back in September, several of my co-workers started a weight loss challenge. I had just realized that a change was needed as I had already hit my heaviest ever (non-pregnant) weight and I was slowly getting close to being as heavy as I had been when I was 9+ months pregnant. Yowzers.

Thank heavens for my calculating co-workers. My boss mentioned the challenge to me and that very day I went down to the accounting department (it had to be in accounting, who else would be the ones to figure out how to calculate percent loss?) and weighed my butt in.

Twelve weeks after that weigh in I was down 11 pounds from my first weigh in and at an official 8.14% lost. The biggest loser came in at about 10.54% lost. Impressive. Overall, since I started a few days ahead of the challenge, I've just hit my 10% loss mark, and I was more than pleased with coming in second place and winning the silver medal. Of weight loss.

I'm going to continue my weight loss ways into April of 2012, folks. I'm also part of "That Weight Loss Challenge 2." My next goals are to get fit, possibly find a Bikram Yoga place near work, and lose another 5 to 10 pounds.

Here I am, at dinner after winning the big challenge.

Your proud loser,
Paula

December 17: Gluten Free Peanut Butter Fudge and Peppermint Bark

2011-12-17T22:04:00.000-08:00

Day 17: Cooking and baking goodies to share with friends and family

We're going to be having an open house tomorrow and so I have been baking! We're having gluten free peanut butter fudge, peppermint bark, and we'll have a cookie decorating station for everyone. I went with good old gluten-filled sugar cookies for those.

Here are the recipes and some photos of the goodies :)

Gluten Free Peanut Butter Fudge, adapted from All Recipes:

Ingredients
    4 cups white sugar
    1 cup milk
    1/2 cup butter
    1 (7 ounce) jar marshmallow creme
    12 ounces peanut butter
    2/3 cup Gluten Free Pantry all-purpose flour

Directions
    Grease a 9x13 inch baking dish, set aside.
    In a saucepan, combine sugar, milk, and butter. Bring to a boil, and cook 5 minutes. Remove from the heat. Stir in the marshmallow creme and peanut butter. Gradually stir in the flour. Spread into the prepared pan, and let cool. Cut into 1 inch by 1 inch squares.

Peppermint Bark, adapted from My Judy the Foodie:

Ingredients:
    8 ounces high-quality semisweet chocolate chips
    8 ounces high-quality white chocolate chips
    4 candy canes, crushed

Instructions:
    Lightly grease a 9×9 inch pan and line with waxed paper, smoothing out wrinkles; set aside.
    Melt the semi-sweet chocolate chips in a microwave safe bowl, following the directions on the package.
    Pour the melted chocolate into the prepared pan, and spread evenly over the bottom of the pan. Sprinkle half of the crushed peppermints over the chocolate layer. Refrigerate until completely hardened
    Melt the white chocolate chips in a microwave safe bowl, following the directions on the package.
    Pour the white chocolate directly over the semisweet chocolate layer; spread evenly.
    Sprinkle the remaining crushed candy over the top and gently press in.
    Refrigerate until completely hardened. Remove from pan; break into small pieces to serve.

I can't wait for our open house :) I'll be sure to report back with photos!

Linked up to: Homemaker on a Dime, The DIY Show-off

December 16: The Love of a Father

2011-12-16T23:29:00.000-08:00

Day 16: Seeing glimpses of Gods love for us in the acts of others

A couple of years ago, Father Rusty introduced me to the story of the Dick and Ricky Hoyt. They are a father and son team who have competed in Ironman together. The thing is, Ricky Hoyt is disabled, and can not walk, nor swim, nor bike, nor run, so it is his father who makes it possible for them to compete together.

Here's an inspirational video about them:

And here is a story about them and how they trained for Ironman:

December 15: Homemade and Inexpensive Toys for a 1 Year Old

2011-12-15T12:49:00.000-08:00

Day 15: Inspire creativity at home for young minds

I'm inspired today by Jenna's post over at That Wife about some of the toddler toys and activities she's created for her son. Many are things that are easy to piece together around your home, or to buy and make.

I think I'd like to make the fishing pole for Zoom, and possibly make 3 additional sets, one each for his twin cousins, and one for his Grandpa (who we call Duwa). Duwa loves to fish and gave each of the babies a "Grandpa's Little Fishing Buddy" hat when they were born. It would be fun to get him to play fishing with them over Christmas. I'm excited about this idea!!

Someone commented that they may make a kit of all the items she's suggested to give as a gift, and that seems like an awesome idea, too.

Jenna also asked about learning toys that we use at our house. We have a felt alphabet that my aunt made for me when I was born. Each pocket has a toy in it, and the toy matches the letter on the pocket. Letter A has a felt apple, Letter B has a boy, etc. After Zoom gets changed, we sing the ABCs (while I point to each letter) and then we pull out three toys (one at a time). This lets me say the letter, make it's sound, and then show him the toy. If we get out L for Lion, we make the lion sound, too. Now Zoom will point at the ABCs after he's changed and sing "AAahhh Baaaay" because he likes it so much!

We also have a lot of "musical" items in our house. Zoom is big on music and noises, and a pot and pan are some of his favorite toys. He plays the drum really well. For Christmas, we are getting the three littles some musical instruments, tiny egg shakers and a couple of musical rhythm sticks each. We all took "Music Together" classes and these instruments are inexpensive, yet easy for little hands to use, and were always a favorite in class!

December 14: It's a Miracle, a quote from "Boston Johnny"

2011-12-14T13:43:00.000-08:00

Day 14: Each of us has the potential to do great things

"Boston" Johnny Rhode is a 66 year old contestant on Season 12 of The Biggest Loser. In one episode, near the end of the season, all of the contestants come back to run a marathon. Johnny completed a FULL marathon after losing 88 pounds, and barely being able to run/walk a single mile just seven months prior. You can see the before and after pictures on NBC's website.

As Johnny was running the marathon, he said "It's a miracle. It's in each of us, and all we have to do is dig it out." And with that I put my TiVo on pause and grabbed a pen. Johnny's quote really spoke to me because it's a truth that stretches far beyond weight loss. It's a truth that lies at the heart of all of our dreams, whether that be education, one's career, relationships, being a parent. There is a nugget of our potential in each of us, and all we have to do is dig it out.

December 13: Free Owl Printable 2012 Calendar From My Owl Barn

2011-12-13T00:19:00.000-08:00

Day 13: Cute calendar to keep and share

The blog My Owl Barn has an adorable Free Owl Printable 2012 calendar posted. You can choose from 45 different images to go with each month and customize it for yourself. What a lovely and generous free printable!! If you are creative, I'm sure you could print this on stock card and make a DIY gift for a friend.

December 12: Christmas Gifts Under $30

2011-12-12T22:00:00.000-08:00

Day 12: Shopping ideas from places and people I know and love

I have a few go-to places and shops that I love to check out when I'm looking for a great gift. Several are local to the San Francisco area. Two others are artists and artisans I like a lot :)

1. Kris Nations Small Wildflower Necklace and/or Earrings

Kris Nations works in SF, and she's an ad agency lady who started her own business. I own a few of her pieces, and have been eyeing this one for a bit. At $29 for the necklace and $27 for the earrings, these are a really great deal on sale. If you are looking to spend a little more, check out her freaking drop dead cool dahlia necklace...

Kris Nations: Small Wildflower Necklace for $29

2. Jessica Swift Prints

Jessica is out of Atlanta, Georgia. She does some amazing art, and after having followed her blog for a few years, you find out she's also an extremely inspirational person. Her joy and positive outlook are infectious. I love this prints, which is priced at $18 each. She has a ton of others, along with calendars, coasters, and rain boots.

Jessica Swift's 'king of the mountain' print, $18

3. Gama Go
Another SF original, Gama Go makes absolutely awesome shirts, home goods, and they are always a go to place for hilarious gifts. They have a whole section of gifts under $15 on their site.


Gama Go's Flavor Savers for $8.

4. Oaklandish
Oaklandish makes T-shirts that highlight East Bay pride. I grew up on that side of the bay and love the 925 and 510 area codes. Back in the day we all shared the 415, but oh well. Anyway, check out these shirts, which come in for $22 for little ones. I love this "Bird on Stump" shirt!

Oaklandish's "Bird on Stump" Toddler T for $22

5. Goat Milk Stuff soap
I ran into Goat Milk Stuff a few years ago on a blog, and tried it on a whim. Wow, I used to have very dry itchy skin and their Purity soap has made an amazing difference. Get this...I don't use anything else to clean my face. Just soap. They have a cool gift pack that comes in at $20. You get to pick the scents, too :)

Goat Milk Stuff's Gift Pack for $20

6. Fox and Moon Tea
Zo is an amazing person, she's super passionate about tea, and yet we met since we've both worked in ad agencies as project managers. Zo sources her own tea internationally, and she does a traveling tea room in addition to selling her tea at retail shops. On her site, she has a sampler set of 3 teas for $22. If you live in the area, she'll be at Renegade Craft Fair this weekend, too :)

Fox & Moon Tea Sampler for $22

So there are a "few of my favorite things." Do you have any favorite go-to gift sites or artists? Please share!

*I didn't receive any sort of compensation, samples, or other "payment" from these sites or artists. I just like their wares and wanted to share some gift ideas.

How to Make a Free Infinity Scarf

2011-12-11T22:23:00.000-08:00

I remember first spying jersey knit infinity scarves on Etsy a couple of years ago. I liked the ones that had several different strands of fabric, long and loopy. After doing a little research on jersey knit cotton, you learn that it's the kind of fabric that doesn't require any hemming along the edges as it doesn't fray.

I finally decided to try making a scarf on my own. Here's how I did it.

1. Find a used black t-shirt (or color of your choice), look for one in a men's XL or XXL. Mine happened to be a programmer swag t-shirt from an Apple conference. I chose an XL, but I usually wear a woman's small, so if you wear a larger size, you may want to look for a bigger t-shirt.
- cut the shirt off below the armpits
2. Now you have just the "body" of the shirt, which is the portion armpit level and below. It should be a giant tube. The tube is where you will eventually be putting your head, this is your neck hole. You could actually stop here if you try it on and like how it looks.
3. Cut he body of the shirt in half again, cutting parallel with the bottom hem of the shirt. You'll be keeping the big "loop" which used to fit around a man's belly as your neck hole.
4. Cutting parallel once again to the hem (or the armpit line, if you're using the top half), cut several "fringes," but be careful not to cut all the way through the top. These cuts are separating portions of the scarf, so that the end look will be many individual "strandrs" of a scarf. You want to leave a large uncut portion at one end, which you will put behind your neck.

You can repeat steps 3 & 4 and make a quick stocking stuffer for a friend.

Go get your coat and get ready to head out! Now you have your free infinity scarf!

Linked to: Homemaker on a Dime, Tater Tots and Jello, Not Just a Housewife,

December 10: The Prayer of Saint Francis

2011-12-10T16:42:00.000-08:00

Day 10: Make me a channel of Your peace

This is a video I made a couple of years ago, set to "The Prayer of Saint Francis," sung by Cecilia. It's one of my favorites. I needed to be reminded of this message as we approach Christmas. It's so easy to be caught up in all of the hurrying and doing, and easy to forget to be good to each other as we prepare for the holiday.

December 9: Helping Homeless Children, an Eye Opening Report from KQED's Dave Iverson

2011-12-09T23:18:00.000-08:00

This morning on the way to work, I caught Dave Iverson's Forum on our NPR station. The topic of the show was San Francisco's homeless school children.

I've got to say, the show really opened my eyes. Please, go listen. There are more than 2,000 homeless school children in San Francisco. I can't even fathom the impact that homelessness has on children. Many of them are with their parents, living on the street or in a shelter. The challenge of getting to school every day means that many miss 2 or 3 days of school a week. They are often exhausted because they have trouble sleeping in shelters or without their own home and bed to sleep in. Because the classroom is safe and warm, the children often fall asleep at their desks. When these children say that they are tired and hungry, it's because they have not slept for days, and they may not have eaten that day.

According to Compass Family Services, "right now there are more homeless children in the United States than at any other time since the Great Depression."

Could you join me in taking a step to do something about this problem? Below are a few agencies that help children. Some accept money, need volunteers, or will accept a gently worn coat. These agencies are mostly local to the SF area, but you can find ones near you by looking up "homeless shelter" or "food bank" in Google.
Berkeley Food & Housing Project - provides services and food to the homeless in Berkeley
Compass Family Services - dedicated to helping the homeless in San Francisco
Homeless Youth Services in Oakland
One Warm Coat -accepts donations of new or gently worn coats, there are drop off locations across the US
Ritter Center of Marin - Provides assistance to the homeless and working poor in Marin County
Second Harvest Food Bank - San Mateo and Santa Clara County food bank
Shelter Network - San Mateo county based homeless shelter.

Tomorrow we will be donating coats to One Warm Coat, which has a drop off point at "Breakfast with Santa." It feels like the least we can do before we sit down to a pancake breakfast and tell Santa what we want with a full belly.

December 8: Losing Weight, Regaining Myself

2011-12-08T22:53:00.000-08:00

Day 8: Re-finding myself as I look at the reasons I'd gained weight

About three months ago to the day, my family celebrated little Zoom's first birthday. It was a lovely event. Family and friends came over for an elephant themed party. I owe you guys some photos of that party.

There is likely a reason I've haven't posted those photos. When I went back and looked at myself I was shocked.

At the time, I no longer fit into my clothes. In fact, I had gotten so heavy that I did not own a single pair of pants that fit me, and I'd moved on to wearing dresses because it was all that fit.

Now I see that I'd been eating because I was still upset and confused about the traumatic events that surrounded Zoom's birth. There was so little I could control over those 56 hours. I'd gone in to labor naturally, and then labored for 56 hours. The doctor quickly decided at about hour 54 that I would need a cesarean. When Zoom was born, he had respiratory issues and was in the hospital for six days. He did not come home with us. None of this was in a birth plan, anywhere, except in the back of my mind as the things that just couldn't happen, ever.

Every pregnant lady probably has one of those "in case" discussions with her partner, husband, coach. I'd told Sean one night "If for any reason they have to take the baby away from me in the delivery room, you follow the baby. I'm strong, I can be alone, I won't be as scared as the baby. You go with our baby and talk to him. He knows your voice and knows you will keep him safe." I get tears in my eyes now knowing that something I said as a "not a chance in the world this will happen" discussion is what ended up happening. Just before I went in to the operating room, I told my doctor that I could only do this if Sean was allowed to leave with the baby and my mom or sister was allowed to come in after he left with Zoom. And that is how it happened. My mom came in and stayed with me as Sean took our baby to the nursery.

A year later, food had become a way to control my environment. And based on the terrifying events of Zoom's birth, the world had become a scary, unpredictable place. Food was predictable. Feeling full was predictable and comforting. I was holding on to what I could to keep going.

Nearly 12 weeks later, I've lost 9.42% of my starting weight, meaning I've lost about 13 pounds. It may not seem like a lot based on "Biggest Loser" standards, but a 10% loss is good. It means nearly 2 pant sizes on me. I'm 4'10" tall.

For me, this weight loss has been a great deal more than losing 13 pounds. I'm regaining "Me." The parts of me that got lost somewhere on September 9, 2010 before Zoom was born, as the cesarean was becoming a reality. The parts of me that battle to re-believe that I am strong, that I am capable, that I am in control. The parts of me that are fierce, unstoppable, and excellent. The woman who excitedly stated to the front desk at Labor and Delivery "I'm here to have a baby," is re-awakening to all that it means to be alive. She is here, she is brave and she ready to take on the world.

December 7: Launch Yourself on Every Wave

2011-12-07T16:29:00.000-08:00

Day 7: Embrace the joy of jubilant moments

"You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment." - Henry David Thoreau

As a child, I remember learning to body surf in San Diego with my family. There's a science to getting yourself in front of a wave, feeling it lift you, maybe paddling a little to get into the zone. And then riding it in, smiling, maybe cheering, but hoping Mom or Dad, or my sister would see that I had actually done it.

My sister and I would ride those waves all afternoon, with no regard for time or hunger or any other care. We were one with the ocean, with its rhythms, with the sole intent of catching a wave because it was so joyful. And part of the fun was being thrown, head over heals, being tossed about and feeling the full force of something bigger than one person could ever comprehend.

The photo above is of Chihuly glass, hand blown, ripples, like an ocean. I couldn't resist pairing it with Thoreau's quote about living in the present moment. I feel like when I'm really on task, doing something I love, I can recapture that feeling I had as a child body surfing. I can "launch myself on every wave," becoming invincible, tireless, and laughing and hugging people the whole time. Eternity and single moments intermingle when I do what I'm most passionate about.

Beyond the joy, there's another part to Thoreau's quote. There's an action. "Launch yourself" and "find your eternity" - he hasn't left it up to just experiencing joy, but instead, seems to be telling us that we must DO something to experience joy in life, and make a decision to engage with life, perhaps with some sort of abandon. We need to throw ourselves towards what brings us joy, and embrace it, get tangled up in it, perhaps be thrown head over heals by it, and certainly give ourselves up to it.

This season, my wish is for each of you to re-experience that immersive, goofy, all encompassing joy for your life. "Launch" yourself into this season, and find yourself bouyed, loved, entranced and entangled by Something much bigger than any one of us alone can ever comprehend.

December 6: Free Christmas Ornaments or Focusing on What's Important

2011-12-06T22:40:00.000-08:00

Day 6: Finding new ways to make Christmas traditions special with a 1 year old

Zoom likes shiny things. He likes to grab them, to throw them, to put them in his mouth. I can't stop him, he's curious. I actually don't want to stop him, it's how he learns.

Enter the Christmas Tree. Instead of seeing the "problems" with having a tree, I'm challenging myself to create something beautiful, inexpensive, and very baby friendly. Today I made some Christmas ornaments, and I have some ideas on ways to make more soon :)

Here are today's ornaments, from artist Becca Kallem via Nicole Balch's post on Making it Lovely. I liked Nicole's joke about "put a bird on it" :) Anyway ... I printed out Becca's beautiful birds, and glued them on to a hanging file folder. I chose the folders because of their green background, I thought that if the non-bird side were to show, the green would blend in with the tree. I cut the birds out and we'll punch a hole and add some ribbon to them to tie them on the tree. Easy, and free :)

Here are some other free ideas I found around the internet:

Free paper stars by Lost Button Studio

Felt Owl ornament by Anna Maria

Pine Cone Garland by Twig and Thistle

December 5: Two Quotes to Keep Close at Heart and thoughts on Star Bellied Sneeches

2011-12-05T15:59:00.000-08:00

Day 5: Remembering to see the connectedness of our world

On our little bulletin board in the dining room, we keep some quotes.

The first one "We is a community, and they is a crowd," was something I found in New Orleans when I went there with my mom. The second quote is "It's the little things in life that touch our hearts the most" which is a thank you note from a friend. I like to keep them nearby, to remind me of what's important.

The community quote reminds of of the Star Bellied Sneeches. Did you ever read that book by Dr. Suess? Where the sneeches run in and out of the star belly machine, trying to fit in, trying to put on stars and take them off ... all in an attempt to be in the popular crowd? The irony of the story is that by the end, no sneech knew if it was popular to have a star on their belly or not. If the sneeches had seen themselves as one big family, a "we," they wouldn't have worried about who had a star, and who did not. Instead, the sneeches were very worried about being an outcast, about fitting in the wrong crowd, about being labeled a "they."

When we focus on similarities, and see the connectedness of each other, we don't waste time focusing on superficial things. When we can see the "we" in our surroundings, our world, we can focus on what is important and let the rest of the drama and nonsense fall away.

December 4: Being a Mother

2011-12-04T23:57:00.000-08:00

Day 4: Thoughts on being present, living in the moment, and on being a mother

Today I spent most of my day with little Zoom. Sean had to work, so Zoom and I were on our own. I like the days that we have together, as I am a mom who works but wishes she could spend so much more time with her son. It's interesting to me that while Zoom has very little language, and is still so dependent, he and I seem to understand each other and delight in each other. I am grateful that he and I have such genuine fun together.

Our days are often simple. I'd hoped to get to the store before he napped, but we went out in the backyard instead. We played in our sandbox. We threw balls back and forth, then randomly started just laughing really hard. He put some rocks in his mouth. I kept telling him not to.

Then he had lunch, a nap, we went to the store, we cleaned his room. We watched the Winnie the Pooh Christmas special and he clapped when Christopher Robin saved the day. What amazed me about that is that this had been his first introduction to the Pooh world, but yet with no spoken language himself, he understood the joy of the animals all getting their presents.

As I thought about what I'd write for this day's challenge, I originally thought I had little to say since I "hadn't gotten much done" and it had been a "normal day." Yet, all day I'd been working on raising a little person. I got tons of things done. We put ornaments on a tree, we talked to the grandparents, I shared a million tiny moments with one of my favorite people on Earth. The challenge for me today is to see the greatness in the tiny things, to take stock in the quiet moments, in teaching, in loving, and in sharing.

December 3: Family Time

2011-12-03T22:26:00.000-08:00

Day 3: Spending cherished time with family, shopping local

We started our day by waking up and going to Denny's. It's not always my favorite place, but I'm going to admit...I suggested we go there because I know Sean likes it there. And it's a good place to take Zoom because it's low key and they do a good job of getting the food out quickly. Sean had already agreed to go to a big warehouse sale with me, so I felt it was important to reciprocate that generous act with suggesting a breakfast place in the same altruistic spirit. I was impressed that Denny's currently has a "Toys for Tots" campaign going on.

We went shopping in the Dogpatch area of San Francisco at a warehouse sale. There were so many cool and talented artists, and the prices were beyond good. We had been to this sale once before, and it makes me feel good to buy from local people. This helps the economy, it encourages people to follow their dreams, and it allows those of us in the 99% to support other people who are working hard to make ends meet. And, you often get to meet the artists and find out a bit about them. My Christmas shopping is now nearly done :)

After Zoom took a nap, we went back out and met up with my sister and her family. When we got home, we put together our tree. Zoom likes the lights and liked seeing it being put together (it's fake). After the tree was up, we sat on the couch and watched a Christmas special together, all three of us. It was nice to have had a day together, and nice to spend some quiet time together after a fun day.

December 2: Mock Interviews

2011-12-02T22:59:00.000-08:00

Day 2: Grateful for employment and a career path I enjoy.

Today at work we had the opportunity to do a mock interview session with students from SJSU (San Jose State University). These students are part of a business club and came to our offices to learn more about credit unions. While we only spent an hour doing the mock interviews, it really took me back to the days before my first job.

The students were all confident, asked great questions, and were super respectful. That I am somehow nearly 20 years older than them is mind boggling to me. One person asked the question of how we got our first job out of college.

Well, right out of UCSB (UC Santa Barbara! Go Gauchos!) I kept in touch with my sorority sisters. A former roommate of mine pointed me to a company that was hiring, and she and I both got jobs at that company. Fast forward to last year and I got my current job through a contact I met way back at the first job out of college. Networking works. Never be shy about asking people if they know of openings, if they'd pass your resume along, and never be afraid to market yourself when you are looking for work.

This experience left me so grateful for my friends, and for finding my way to a career (Project Management) that I really love.

Here I am putting together some creative displays at work before a big party. This photo is by Gerard Lozano, photographer extraordinaire.

December 1: Giving Tree and Fistula Foundation

2011-12-01T22:10:00.000-08:00

This year, for Advent, I'm going to do my own version of an Advent calendar. Each day,

I'll be posting something where I've challenged myself to DO SOMETHING to show my gratitude for my life. I want to move from the grace and beauty of Thanksgiving, and keep that going as we move into Christmas. With all of the greed that seemed to erupt around Black Friday, I'm going to do my best to focus on good deeds, acts of gratitude, and generosity.

For December 1, I have two items to share :) At work, we are having a challenge to see which department donates the most to a local "toys for tots" charity. In honor of little Zoom, I picked the names of two one year old boys and bought them each a gift.

My other act for the first day is something I'd like to become a new tradition. Instead of going shopping on Black Friday, I volunteered to work at the Fistula Foundation in San Jose. The Fistula Foundation has provided over 3,000 surgeries to women in poor countries who suffer from obstetric fistula. These fistulas occur when women do not receive appropriate medical care during child birth. If you want to learn more, here is a link to their site.

I donated my time and was put to work stuffing envelopes and putting together some of their Dignity Gifts (the blue flower scarf - you can see it to the right and can buy it here). I felt like I was doing important work, helping provide this group with a way to maximize the profits from their online store. It gave me time to think about my own experience with child birth. Even though that labor was 56 hours, I realize that I am a lucky one, I had health insurance, I had health care, I was in a hospital. As I worked stuffing envelopes, I faced a huge map of the world that showed the maternal mortality rates throughout the globe. There were no words for the gratitude that filled me, that humbled me, as I sat alone doing a simple task that day.

I left that day feeling grateful, for my own life, for doctors who saved my life, and who were able to save Zoom, too. It struck me that I was also grateful for the start of Advent, and the promise of a new baby so many years ago. A baby born without a hospital, without doctors, to a poor couple, and yet despite his humble beginnings, He was coming to to fulfill a special promise and save the world.

Thanksgiving Thoughts

2011-11-27T13:28:00.000-08:00

I love Thanksgiving. This year we hosted, having nine people over for dinner. Three of the attendees were one year old. And I like to think they had a great time. This face on little Zoom says it all for me. "I'm thankful for this moment, this amazing food, all these people around me who love me more than I can imagine."

Wishing you and yours much love and happiness as we enter the Christmas Season!

We are Called to be Fearless People

2011-11-16T06:00:00.000-08:00

On the drive home once, from The Sea Ranch, I stopped at one of my favorite places on Earth. It's on Meyer's Grade, a tiny road up way above the Pacific Ocean, just a tad inland from Highway 1. If you look South from this spot, you can see the coast and the land, mingling and crashing together. Rocks and water, dancing. There's often no one else ever up there, so it's like the whole world is your own.

This time, it was summer and it was twilight. Instead of looking South that night, I looked North, to an old oak towering limbs, and the tree's amazing darkened silhouette against the summer night sky. Nature was putting on another show, this tree was reminding me there was beauty in every piece of creation. Sure, the showy coast was the usual attention grabber, but here, this night, without a word or a sound, a tree stole the spotlight. A simple reminder that each of us just needs to be ourselves, in our own beauty, in our own way, and at our own time.

"We are called to be fearless people in a fearful world." - Henry Nouwen

We Make a Life by What We Give

2011-11-10T12:18:00.000-08:00

A little while ago, Zoom and I were on a walk out by the lagoon. There was a park bench there, and a quote was on a little sign on the bench. It's simple, but I loved the message. It's not attributed to anyone, just left for the world to ponder as they look out on the lagoon.

We make a living by what we get.
We make a life by what we give.

If you'd like to download it for your own personal use, here's the link.

Friday Fun: Skyscrapers, Palm Islands, World Change

2011-11-04T12:00:00.000-07:00

This week I came across a handful of things that really captured my interest, about how we have impacted our planet and here they are:

Skyscraper Page - this is a full website dedicated to showcasing the skyscrapers of the world. You can dig deeper and look at comparison charts of the largest, the ones in your city, really any statistic! I love seeing the comparisons - for fun, here are five of the proposed skyscrapers, from the Skyscraper Page.

Palm Islands and "The World"Islands - Have you seen these? They are man made islands (archipelagos actually) in Dubai, and they seem like they are straight out of a terra-forming exercise in the game Civilization. Here is both the Palm Islands and The World, both were formed to look like their name. This first photo is from NASA:

Can you see the continents of the globe? (photo from NASA) This set of islands is sinking, and while they were originally meant to be privately owned and funded, only 1 has development on it to date. Check out this article.

NASA's World of Change page. This page shows some of the environmental impacts that humanity has had on the globe. There is more detail about the building of the Palm Islands, as well. It's very interesting to see the impact on Storms, Seasons, Shrinking Seas, Water Levels, Sea Ice, and Burn Patterns.

"Lord, take me where You want me to go," a quote from Father Mycal Judge

2011-11-02T06:30:00.000-07:00

At our last retreat, Father Evan came in to speak to us and shared a quote by Father Mycal Judge:
Lord, take me where You want me to go,
let me meet who You want me to meet,
tell me what You want me to say,
and help keep me out of Your way.

Mycal Judge was a priest in New York City, and a chaplain for the New York Fire Department. He is known as the "Saint of 9/11;" he stayed with his battalion of fire fighters at the World Trade Center, and prayed with them just before the North Tower collapsed, which also took his life. His last public word were in response to Mayor Rudy Guliani's calling out, "Father Mike, pray for us!" to which Father Mycal replied, "I always do! I always pray for you!"

If you want to read more about Father Mycal Judge, please see this blog. I offer my simple photo and his quote as an inspiring reminder of one man's work. Sometimes to do the work we were placed on Earth to do, we just need to be mindfully present of God's presence in our life, welcoming His spirit, and instead of looking to do our own will, looking to do God's will. It's a delicate dance, and one that takes daily practice.

A Digital Daughter Returns Home: Published in Yale Reflections Magazine

2011-11-01T15:45:00.000-07:00

Oh my. I got the happiest, loveliest call from my good friend Kathleen of "Joy
in the Chaos" yesterday. She was calling to say that she'd gotten the latest copy of Yale
Divinity School's "Reflections" magazine and had just read my article. We laughed, talked about Halloween, and laughed some more. Kathy and I were room mates at Yale, living in the servant's quarters of a big old house in New Haven. It was cold in the winter, too hot in the summer, and on one fateful Halloween the boiler blew up and flooded the basement. But, I digress.

It's with much excitement that I announce that my article is included in the latest edition of "Reflections," which is titled "iBelieve: Facing the New Media Explosion." I wrote editor Ray Waddle a quick email a few months ago asking if I might provide a little piece on my experience, with digital advertising, retreat work, with my thoughts on being a "Digital Daughter." Eventually, we got to about a 1400 word piece (up from what started as about 500), and wow! I got to tell a little of my own story about San Damiano.

You can see the list of other pieces here at the Reflections page. It will be available in a digital format soon, the irony being they needed each of us to sign a waiver to offer our articles online.

Halloween: Mummy Meatloaf, Monster Mash (Potatoes) and Dracula's Dentures

2011-10-30T22:46:00.000-07:00

Happy Halloween! Today we had dinner with my sister's family and I whipped up a frightful meal to celebrate the holiday. Ready to see this?

Monster Mash (Potatoes)
Just regular mashed potatoes, with olives for eyes.

Mummy Meatloaf
This one is gluten free, and the recipe is from here. I had not made it before, but it was GOOD. It struck me that I could shape thee meatloaf like an Egyptian Mummy. It's kind of horrifying how this started:

Here it is cooking in the oven:

And here it is cooked, and then covered in cooked (gluten free) lasagna noodles. I cut off the rippled edges of the noodles, which let me make noodle strips of various widths:

I cooked it one more time to warm it up, which caused the noodles to shrivel, revealing some of the crispy mummy below, how ghoulish!!

And for dessert? Dracula's dentures! Simply put, these are gluten free chocolate chip cookies, red vanilla frosting, mini marshmallows, and almond slivers. The recipe was inspired by this one from Nestle.

Bwahahaha! What are you doing for Halloween?

Shared on Homemaker on a Dime Hop, Just a Girl Blog, Creations by Kara.

Zoom Friday: Dreaming of a Play Fort

2011-10-27T21:30:00.000-07:00

Now that baby Zoom is a year old, I find myself dreaming of making a fort. The kind of place you can put 1 million pillows, an army of stuffed animal friends, where books and magic wands and secret things can hide. The kind of little corner where a baby snuggles up for a cat nap, and where we'd play and play and always save the day.

Here are a gorgeous, billowy ideas for Zoom's play fort.

This one is my favorite idea. I have left over fabric that matches his room that would be AWESOME:

Source: ohdeedoh.com via Paula on Pinterest

Super cute ideas to transform a dining or coffee table:

Source: hawthornethreadsblog.com via Paula on Pinterest

Under a dining room table:

Source: allfortheboys.com via Paula on Pinterest

This one uses blinds!

Source: countryliving.com via Paula on Pinterest

Did you ever build a fort as a kiddo?

Blessings by Laura Story and "God's Love"

2011-10-20T14:14:00.000-07:00

Our next retreat is this Saturday and our focus is "God's Love: Learning to See with New Eyes." The idea came to me when I saw how Zoom reacted to my Mom giving him an old toy that I had played with as a child. He lit up. The toy was new, beautiful, full of promise, of play, of life to him. His love made this old toy come alive again.

I realize that loving something gives it that kind of new life. God loves us that way, beyond our own understanding or belief, without reason or exception. And if we just let ourselves feel that love, we are new, too. We are refreshed and loved and all shiny.

It struck me as I was listening to Laura Story's song "Blessings" that she's talking about a similar thing. We can't always understand what God's intent for us is, and sometimes the things that seem the hardest for us have our best intentions in His mind. If we're so stuck in our own world, so determined to see things our way, we'd never understand this. It's only when we choose to see things with new eyes, with God's eyes, that we can start to see the blessings all around us.

If you haven't heard the song, here it is.

Friday Fun Links: Jewelry, Sweet Nursery, Chickens, a Desk and Zoom

2011-10-07T10:47:00.000-07:00

I've found a few gorgeous things and new-to-me blogs around the internet in the last week. I figured it would be fun to share them with you all.

Mimi & Lu: Gorgeous jewlery for a good cause. Jewlery maker Michelle Watson named her company using a mashup of her name, her husband's name, and their dog's name (Lucca). Lucca has been diagnosed with cancer, and Michelle has a flashsale going on this weekend to raise money. Her stuff is super cute :) and so is great dane Lucca!

One Claire Day is an adorable blog by Claire, out of North Queensland, Australia. The nursery she created for her daughter, Eulalie is breath takingly cute. I'm in love with the chandelier she chose!

The Bloggess posted a recent story about why you should choose your battles. I can't really do any sort of justice as to how freaking hilarious this post is, so you really have to read it. She does drop the F-bomb, so consider yourself forewarned; the story itself is laugh out loud funny though :)

At home, we've gathered the materials to make a desk a la the ones found at Young House Love and Aubrey + Lindsay's Little House blog. We currently have the base we want to use (an old desk and a garage sale book case), and we've purchased the boards we are going to use. Now I'm dreaming of some cute arm chairs for us. The desk will seat two, so both our computers have a home and Sean and I can well, game (World of Warcraft FTW) together.

The Zoom update - the little Mr has hit the year mark! and I'm planning a recap of the party, which was an elephant theme. He's taken a first step (but just one, which I am fine with), and he has transitioned to a new room at day care.

Have you found any great items around the web? Or want me to consider your blog or site for a future Friday? Leave a comment! I'd love to hear from you :)

*no form of payment was received for my posting links today; these are all just places and things I found and loved and wanted to share!

The Feast of Saint Francis

2011-10-05T13:18:00.000-07:00

This last weekend we headed out of town to Guerneville, California which is up on the Russian River. The cottage we stayed at had a peaceful garden, along with a statue of Saint Francis, surrounded by little animals. I thought it was so appropriate, and uncanny, that we were visiting on the traditional "blessing of the animals" day (usually done in the first weekend of October). And, near the feast day for Saint Francis. It was nice to have him there, watching over us.

In fine Franciscan tradition, we ate, we laughed, we enjoyed Brother Redwood and Sister River. The mighty ocean met us with open arms. We greeted birds and squirrels. Zoom crawled around in the majesty of creation. We had a wonderful time.

"Start by doing what's necessary; then do what's possible; and suddenly you are doing the impossible." - Saint Francis

Today I made this image from a photo of that statue, along with a quote from Saint Francis. I love the "baby step" approach; that some days we just have to do what we can, but with perseverance, with dedication, and likely with a little faith that we will succeed, we move on to be doing what we'd only dreamed about. I love that he's given voice to the idea that you have to start DOING before you can BE the person you want to be. But it just takes a step towards the goal, and then you are on your way.

You can download it at Flickr if you want :)

Quieting the Mind for Silent Meditation

2011-09-29T01:06:00.000-07:00

On my way to lead the 7:30am contemplative prayer service at the last weekend retreat, I snapped this photo of the chapel. I loved the light, and the way it hit the door. There was something about the moment, the quiet, the long shadows, that reminded me of an early morning walk I once took in Jerusalem.

Our theme for the weekend was "Finding God and Oneself in the the Digital Age," and admittedly I felt funny carrying my iPhone with me. I wanted to time the contemplative prayer / meditation I was leading. The first time anyone does a silent meditation, it's good to start with just a few minutes. Quieting one's mind is a daunting task in itself, and even moments can seem like an eternity.

My little group walked up the stairs, up to the private chapel usually used by the friars. It seemed like an honor to be in the space, up above the kitchen. We sat quietly, and I led them through the practice of silent meditation. I thought about the many men who had sat here in communion, every morning, to spend time with God.

Clear your mind, pushing aside every thought.
If a new thought enters, acknowledge it, and visualize pushing it from the left to the right, sweeping it away. Welcome it, thank it for it's presence, and sweep it away.

Our group made it through the whole five minutes easily. I wished I had more time to keep meditating, but below us where the sounds of breakfast, and the smell of coffee. It was time to go, continue with our retreat, and get swept back up in the schedule of the day.

Happiness is Trying to Find You

2011-09-26T22:54:00.000-07:00

"Ever since happiness heard your name, it has been running through the streets trying to find you.” - Hafiz

I took this picture back in 2007 in Edinburgh, Scotland. I'd met my parents there for a trip to celebrate my Dad's retirement, and it truly was one of those amazing trips. We laughed so hard, we drank some great Scotch, and we really enjoyed each others' company. I'm grateful for those trips, those special times with my family. I saw this quote by Hafiz and it reminded me of that trip, of us taking the time to be happy.

Sometimes it seems like we are so wrapped up in our day to day lives that we forget to be grateful. We forget that we are free to be happy. It is so easy to be drawn to the negative and the doubts. I love the visual idea that happiness has become personified, in spirit, and that it is running around just looking for us. As we trudge along blindly, it's hiding, ready to surprise us, ready to embrace us. All we have to do is look up and see it!

Here's the link to the image and quote in full size.

Annual Fundraiser Dinner at San Damiano

2011-09-19T22:03:00.000-07:00

Last night was our annual fundraiser dinner. It starts with a silent auction, and then moves into dinner, and a live auction.

Here's a picture of our table, full of members (past and present) of the Young Adult Ministry team:

Back row: Father Rusty, Tammy, Ron, Rebecca, and Marc
Front row: Kevin, Paula, Sean, and Nancy

I'm also putting the finishing touches on my article for Yale's Reflections publication. I'm super excited; it's turned into about a 1500 word piece, up from an original 500 words. It's been a great experience!

We're also working on our next retreat, and you can read about it on the San Damiano site.

Contemplating Lots of Quotes and Anne Lamott

2011-08-11T00:12:00.000-07:00

I'm working on material for the next retreat, "Finding God and Oneself in the Digital Age," along with working on a small piece for the YDS journal, Reflections. Tonight I banged out possibly the worst first draft ever. In these moments, I have to think of Anne Lamott's words from her "Bird by Bird" book. She says you have to get that first draft out of the way and then you can move on.

But, I've had lots of quotes on my mind. This always happens, I'm trying to write my own presentations and sometimes other people have such profound insights.

For this retreat, I'm reading The Ragamuffin Gospel by Brennan Manning, Digital Disciples by Adam Thomas, and I may pick up something else from Richard Rohr. I'm in love with the Ragamuffin Gospel, it's quickly becoming one of those books that is getting dog eared, underlined, and taken everywhere I go.

In other news, little Zoom turns 11 months old today. I can't believe it's been nearly a year. Today to mark the occasion, he threw up in Joann's Crafts after gagging himself with a rubber ducky. Truly one of the stranger things I've seen happen. He's fine now, and I know better than to leave the diaper bag in the car.

Put Away the Spiritual Cosmetics: Every Life Has a Story

2011-08-04T21:52:00.000-07:00

This week I was in "New Employee Orientation," and while I work as a project manager in a credit union, one of the videos we watched was a training video for Chick-Fil-A. I found it to be riveting:

From an HR perspective, our trainer wanted us to think about how every "customer" has a story if we just choose to ask them about it. I think this is valuable. I really do feel moved to help our "members" (as we call them) because they have entrusted us with their money. It's an honor. I'm lucky to work amongst people who keep that kind of thing in mind, every day.

The thing that struck me as I watched this video is that everyone is broken. Everyone has something they keep to themselves, that haunts them, and yet everyone puts on a happy face when they go out into the world. Everyone has bad days. I try to give others the benefit of the doubt when they are unkind as I don't know what kind of day they've had.

What's even more striking is that God knows each of our stories. He knows without asking, without our telling. He knows, and he loves and accepts us. And this is the meaning of grace.

This is the heart of Brennan Manning's book, "The Ragamuffin Gospel," which I'm reading now. In the people of this video, I see parts of my own broken-ness. I see the little bits of personal history that people often hide from themselves and try to hide from God. And it resonates deeply with Manning's thoughts that God's grace and acceptance means that "When I go to church, I can leave my white hat at home and admit I have failed. God not only loves me as I am, but also knows me as I am. Because of this I don't need to apply spiritual cosmetics to make myself presentable to Him. I can accept ownership of my poverty and powerlessness and neediness."

It's this idea of putting away spiritual cosmetics to cover up our perceived flaws, that appeals to me. If we could all just admit and embrace those pieces of our broken-ness, wouldn't that be freeing? If we could give up feeling judged and judging others? If we could know that everyone, all around us, has as many shadow moments as we do? There is power in that kind of knowledge, along with great freedom, knowing that we are accepted just as we are.

Step into the Light onto New Holy Ground

2011-08-03T23:41:00.000-07:00

Sean and I have been at odds with one another over some lingering divorce issues. Suffice to say that divorce is never, ever easy. Two lives that had been combined are irreparably being separated, worlds, thoughts, love, things, all torn apart. I know, I have been there, and it's one of the hardest things I have ever done.

I'm going to be honest. It's not easy for me to see Sean having to go through this. We are supposed to be getting married, but now that there is an issue that has to do with debt and alimony, and lots of money things, it seems we must wait to be married. As a planner, a project manager, I do not do well with things when they are out of my realm of control. It's not so much that I am impatient, but that I like to be informed and I like to plan. This whole situation has placed me squarely outside of my comfort zone.

It's made me realize that loving someone means that you sometimes have to support them, love them, even when you are uncomfortable. This has moved us beyond the new-found squishy cutesy-name kind of love. This is love, big and bold, loud and brash, screaming in your face. This is when you hold on, dig in, and pray. Pray for strength, pray for direction, pray that you have done the right thing. Pray that you will make it through, together.

This morning's discussion was going poorly. I knew I had to challenge myself, and so I admitted to Sean that I was as scared as I've ever been. That I've been pushed out of my comfort zone and I know that I've come across as angry when I don't mean to. I'm trying with all of my heart and strength to stand my ground and make things work. I told Sean that I have to keep telling myself that I believe in us, even in the moments when I part of me says I shouldn't. That I believe we can get through this, even when my old self would have turned tail and run. That great relationships are met with trial, that the strong ones find strength in each other, and that together couples overcome adversity, instead of crumbling beneath it. We cried and agreed, and stopped arguing.

On the way in to work, I wanted to hear a song of hope. Of courage. I wanted to hear Craig Taubman sing that "in the bitter and the sweet, in the calm and in the storm, all of life is Holy Ground." I typed "Holy Ground" into YouTube and got back a long list of results, including a song by OMD.

OMD (Orchestral Maneuvers in the Dark) is my favorite band. They were big in the 80s, perhaps you remember them from "If you leave," "Dreaming," or "Forever Live and Die." They hadn't recorded anything in years, and last I knew they were not together or touring.

Today, I found OMD's "New Holy Ground," which is a off of an album released last year that I have never heard. It's a song full of hope. I firmly believe that this was no mistake, no random event. The universe heard my words and knew I needed to be bolstered. I feel that this song was an affirmation of the growth that happens when someone admits they are afraid. I had stared down the demons, I had quieted all the voices in my head that said to run and hide. I spoke my heart, and I recognized and chose love instead of listening to my own ego, which always wants each of us to choose fear. I was proud of myself. And here, being sung by my favorite band, in words I had never heard before, was a song that spoke of my decision and my current journey:

"Take a look at yourself and walk to the edge
And take a deep breath and be someone else
Take a look at yourself and see what is found
Step into the light onto new holy ground"

A Video 'Trailer' for the August Retreat

2011-08-03T00:41:00.000-07:00

I whipped up a little video trailer on the August retreat Father Rusty and I are working on, hopefully for use on the San Damiano home page. Here's a sneak peek before it goes "prime time" -

Two Podcast Highlights from This Week

2011-07-29T00:27:00.000-07:00

Recently I've been listening to podcasts during my commute. Some of them have been especially noteworthy. Here are a two that I have found and are think are worth a listen (and isn't it strange both are from March 13?):

The Spirit Indwelling - Cornerstone Church, Simi Valley from March 13, 2011
- I love the ideas of God's making his home amongst us as discussed in this podcast. A really great discussion around how God's home had been first found in a tent, amongst the Israelites, and later in the tabernacle of Jerusalem. Finally, that Spirit makes its home in Jesus, and with us, in the flesh. Obviously I like anything that has to do with the Spirit :)

Hyper Reality and the Bread of Life - Matt Chandler, The Village Church from Sunday March 13, 2011.
This podcast really hits the heart of the matter, and Matt discusses how today's media constantly provides us with unreasonable and overcharged versions of reality. I love his take on this!

The Grace of God, a Quote by Frederick Buechner

2011-07-26T21:55:00.000-07:00

"The grace of God means something like: Here is your life. You might never have been, but you are because the party wouldn't have been complete without you." - Frederick Buechner

Click through to Flickr to download the image in a larger size (hooray! desktop wallpaper!)

"The Wilder Life" and a Connection to the Great Beyond

2011-07-23T22:44:00.000-07:00

Growing up, I fell in love with Little House in the Prairie. It might have been because we lived in Minnesota during the years that the Little House TV show was on the air. I read every book, I had the yellow bonnet with tiny red flowers. I watched the show. I was a "bonnet head."

My love was rekindled when I started TiVoing Little House again this last year. Sean hadn't seen the show. It was fun introducing someone to the characters. It was amusing to tell him about what had been in the books, and that Albert was just an addition for television. It was also really cool to see the nuances of Ma and Pa in a new light, now that I have a baby of my own.

My sister knows that I love Little House and she gave me the book "The Wilder Life" by Wendy McClure. Wendy is also a bonnet head, and as an adult she has gone in search of "Laura World." Much like myself, growing up she felt like she knew Laura, was her friend, experienced life through Laura's eyes. Part of McClure's book is her journey in search of pieces of Laura's life, visiting places she lived and taking in the sites that Laura may have seen.

One of the first stops for McClure is in Pepin, Wisconsin, known in the books as The Big Woods. She stops at a log cabin that has been re-created near Laura's birth place. It feels like little more like a high way rest-stop, lacking the feeling that it was the Ingalls' home. While Wendy was looking for Laura, she found little to tie her to the past in the uninspired space. That is, until she pauses to look out across Lake Pepin, where Laura had gathered pebbles as a little girl. This lake is also in the beginning of Little House on the Prairie. The Ingalls family crosses the frozen-over Lake Pepin at the end of the winter in their covered wagon as they are leaving the Big Woods.

"As solid as the lake looked, there was also something sort of miragelike about it, with the overlay of gray weather between us and the opposite shore. I felt, very distinctly, that if we went across we would follow them. I mean 'them' as them, and it seemed to me, too, that the same other side they'd reached in their covered wagon would be there instead of Lake City, the present, whatever. It seemed perfectly matter-of-fact that it would be this way; that just as the winter turns water into roads, it makes the world revert like this.

'I hadn't expected it to be like this,' I told Chris. Meaning I hadn't thought I would find something like an opening into Laura World, that I would come this close."

I was really struck in reading this passage. McClure is out on a mission, a pilgrimage, looking for a place, a feeling, an understanding of something she holds so dear to her heart. She's longing to understand more about the past, about a real person, and to really feel something that Laura felt and saw.

I feel like this longing, this searching, this feeling of connection is something that each of us is searching for. We are all looking for those fleeting moments were we feel deeply connected to something larger than ourselves, something timeless, and something that transcends the here and now. I have felt that looking at the ceiling of the Sistine Chapel, another time surrounded by friends on my 18th birthday as we looked over the San Francisco skyline and could hear Paul McCartney playing in the distance. I have felt it praying, singing with others, and tonight when Zoom and I were laughing.

It seems like these moments are like the white pickets in a larger fence surrounding a gorgeous garden. We can see the fence, and it is beautiful, and through the pickets, we can see hints of the breath-taking garden beyond. These fleeting moments of life are glimpses to heaven, to our larger connectedness, to God. They are reminders of our longing to be connected, to live beyond this world and this body. They are lovely and simultaneously remind us that there is something beyond this existence. And what lies beyond is the ultimate connection, when we will be one with our interconnectedness, with a larger love, with an understanding beyond our full comprehension in this life time.

Working on the Next Retreat: Digital Gluttony

2011-07-18T23:54:00.000-07:00

Last night I finished up an article that I titled "Daddy Warbucks in Pantyhose" and sent it off to Catapult Magazine. I'm really enjoying being a part of their community. Even though I have such limited time now, it feels good to have a deadline. I can't wait to share my Daddy Warbucks piece with you all!

I also have an interesting opportunity to write a piece about "Finding God and Oneself in the Digital Age" for the Yale publication "Reflections." It's a little mind boggling, but the editor asked for entries about experiences in social networking. The topic for the Fall matches what my August retreat will be about. I had a good call with the editor and I'm excited about sharing some of my retreat experiences with "Reflections."

This leads me to the place where I need to get the rubber to the road on creating content for the August retreat. That's not to say that I haven't done anything, I have. Most of it is still swishing around in my head.

I'm going to try my hardest to get back to the business of writing regularly about the topic. Some of this will be a rough cut, allowing me to figure out what to put forth for the weekend retreat.

One of the things that interests me about the Digital Age is what I've come to all "Digital Gluttony." I am guilty of this kind of gluttony myself; spending hours upon hours of surfing the internet. I pour over pictures on Facebook of people I don't really know and wouldn't recognize in the grocery store. I get lost in World of Warcraft. I play games that serve no Earthly purpose, not for a few moments of entertainment, but for hours.

In some ways, I can see that the lure of the internet (and I'll lump gaming in to this bucket) is that there is so much to see and do. When you're purposefully and thoughtfully engaged in doing things, I think the Internet is a wonderful tool. But it's when one is mindlessly, compulsively clicking that surfing the web becomes more like an addiction than it is a tool for information.

And it's in the over-saturating stage that one often finds the other darker side of Digital Gluttony - isolation. When one is mindlessly clicking about, only viewing the events of others' lives from the sidelines, when one is acting more like a voyeur than a participant, the internet can be lonely.

I realize that anything in life can be isolating when it's not done in moderation. Even the happiest and healthiest behaviors, when done excessively, can leave a person outside normal social circles. In order for us to get past this, we have to remind ourselves to be present and active participants. This is the same in anything in life. At work, at home, with friends, if we don't actively engage with others, look for joy in the moments we have, we can find ourselves in a lonely place.

Zoom Friday Has a New Home

2011-07-15T01:11:00.000-07:00

Hi friends - I've made the leap to move Zoom's stories over to his own blog. If you'd like to join in on his ongoing adventures, please let me know by emailing me at welcomingspirit at gmail dot com. The new blog is private, so I'll need to send you an invitation.

There will still be Zoom updates here from time to time, but I'm going to get back to focusing on retreat work with Welcoming Spirit.

Hope you all have a great weekend!
Paula

Zoom Friday: The Joy of Swimming

2011-07-08T10:28:00.000-07:00

With summer upon us, we've been spending a lot of time in the pool. We're lucky enough to have a community pool nearby; we can see it from our windows and it's just a quick walk away.

I think I have always known that Zoom would love to swim.This might be what some call maternal instinct. It's more than that, I KNEW. He would flip and flip and turn around again and again when he was in the womb. Always moving.

The first time we took him swimming, it was sheer joy. We were in Tucson. My own mother was there and got to see him, wide eyed, joyous, laughing, kicking, free. I was so glad that she got to share in the joy that he embodied in the water. He smiled an impossibly large smile. He squealed with delight. He had found something that made his soul sing.
I'm so glad that we live so close to a pool, and that we can go swimming whenever we want. Over the last week, we've been three times. Zoom has two swimsuits now, one with dogs and lifegaurd rings and matching hat, the other without a nautical theme. Very preppy. We get ready, Sean throws little Zoom on his shoulders, and we grab towels and his floaty toy and we go. Zoom smiles bigger and bigger, knowing where we are going. Sometimes we see a dog on the way and he laughs. He is so happy.

We get in the pool and the kicking, the laughing, it is the same as the first time we went. His eyes squint, he smiles so big that his five teeth show. He puts is face in the water, blinks his eye rapidly so that he can see again. All the while, his eyes are saying all he ever needed to say,"thank you momma, thank you, this world is so good and so big and so amazing. I am swimming. Swimming! Do you see? We have a pool and we are lucky."

And all I can think is that yes, little one, you are right. We are so very lucky.

Generation X, the Cold War and Faith

2011-07-07T10:36:00.000-07:00

This piece was published in *cino magazine on June 24, 2011, as part of their "My Generation" issue. I'm excited to share it here, and once again thank Vineeta of artnlight for her inspiration.

Two years ago, I was leading a weekend retreat entitled “Spiritual Pilates: Strengthening our Spiritual Core,” and giving the final talk on a Sunday morning in Lent. I’d chosen a closing quote that tied in nicely with our theme and printed it out with a graphic to leave on the participants’ chairs as they came in for our final session. The quote read:

"When you come to the end of all the light you know, and it’s time to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things shall happen: Either you will be given something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly."
- Edward Teller

Art by nairvee of artnlight, on Flickr

As the people began to read the quote, a strange quiet came over the room. One lady, likely from the Baby Boomer Generation pulled me aside. “You know who wrote that, don’t you,” she asked me, seemingly distraught.

“Well, Edward Teller,” I said.

“And you know he worked on the atomic bomb, don’t you?” she continued, “He was part of the Manhattan Project and is known as ‘the father of the hydrogen bomb.’”

I felt a little sick. Uncharacteristically, I hadn’t done my homework on WHO had written the quote. I’d been taken by the hope, the light and the notion of God’s abundant love I found in the quote. And that’s what I told her. “Well, I thought you should know who wrote that before you talked about it,” she said.

I got the sense that she was worried that in a room of mostly Boomers, I’d stumbled across a taboo topic. There seemed to be a fear in the room, a palpable sense that a quote from the man who invented the nuclear bomb could not and should not be considered as a source of inspiration. But I couldn’t retrieve the handouts at that point. This was a teachable moment and I just had to figure it out.

I took a moment to pray about the quote. Why had I been drawn to it? Was it inspired? I felt that Teller eloquently wrapped up the hope that is inherent in every thing, every day, every person. That morning, I told the retreat group that I saw Teller as a man who was reflecting on his own humanity, as he had to live with the knowledge that he’d had a hand in an invention ultimately used for destruction. If that man couldn’t reflect on faith, hadn’t lived through meeting darkness head on, then I didn’t know who had. He understood as well as anyone could that when you do reach the end of light, all you have to hold on to is faith. The retreatants seemed to be satisfied with my thoughts and we moved on to closing prayers.

Born in 1972, I sit squarely in the midst of Generation X, which is often defined as those who were born between about 1960 and 1982. I know what others say about my generation — that we question authority, that we’re the materialistic “Me” generation, that we don’t quite fit in. We’re quirky. We’re all going to make less money than our fathers. Or maybe those are the things they said about us when we were teenagers, and that’s what everyone thinks of all teenagers.

Generation X inherited of the long-term effects of a nation used to being at war. Many of us were born during the Vietnam War. Even the titles of the generations before us are defined by the wars, with our parents being in either the Baby Boomer or the Silent Generation — those either too young to go to World War II or born after troops returned home victoriously from the “Last Great War.” By the time the first of Generation X was being born, fighting had been a part of the United States’ collective reality for so long that much of the sixties was spent objecting to war. And, once the world was free from actual long-term combat fighting, and there was no longer any “real” war, we entered in to what we called the Cold War from 1946-1991.

The Cold War wasn’t something that Gen X really understood. Maybe no one really understood it. While there was still an army, there wasn’t a traditional battlefield like there had been in the World Wars, or Vietnam or Korea. The Cold War, from the eyes of a child, was a war of Fear. I knew that we were trying to keep the world safe from communism. However, the Communist Bloc that we were most familiar with made appearances in films and television, like the James Bond and Rocky movies. It seemed like this war had become less about reports of battle and combat to a mass-media obsession with spies, nuclear threat and possible global annihilation.

I remember being frightened as a child that a loosely defined “they” were going to drop the bomb on us. Literally with each plane that flew overhead, I wondered if it was my last moment on Earth. I didn’t talk to anyone about it, but I figured that everyone else felt it, too. I didn’t sleep much from age 10 to 20 (I was about 20 when the Cold War ended in 1991), and I now wonder if my many sleepless nights can be attributed to an omnipresent threat that over which I had no power. I felt fear that at any moment, the hundreds of silos stocked full of nuclear warheads would be unleashed on us, without warning, and we would all be part of a nuclear holocaust.

In the early 1980s, the media helped feed and document this fear. Movies like The Day After depicted the horror of waking up the morning after nuclear war to a world of radiation and impending death. WarGames was the story of a young hacker who broke into a U.S. military computer that was programmed to run nuclear war simulations, and nearly started World War III.

The fear went beyond the U.S., with music reflecting the concern of global nuclear warfare. In 1980, the British Group OMD recorded the song “Enola Gay,” which questions the decision to send an airplane of the same name to drop the first atomic bomb (“Little Boy”) on Hiroshima in 1945. 1984’s “99 Luftballons” by Nena addressed the possibility of a nuclear war being started after both sides of the Cold War mistook red balloons sent up by children over Berlin for hostile weapons. Indeed, in mass media, the world was still trying to make sense of the power and destructive force of nuclear weapons 35 and 40 years after World War II ended.

The general feeling of persistent, malicious, yet inescapable fear of impending nuclear death was well reflected by Alphaville’s song “Forever Young.” An upbeat, danceable song, its lyrics are dark and recount the reality of a world simultaneously resolved to and obsessed with dying from nuclear war. Written by a German band, it has become the macabre ballad of a generation concerned with the youthful pastimes of dance and style, and all the while clouded by the fear of death through a war they don’t fully understand and can’t control:

let’s dance in style, let’s dance for a while

heaven can wait, we’re only watching the skies

hoping for the best, but expecting the worst

are you going to drop the bomb or not?

let us die young or let us live forever

The legacy left by the nuclear bomb, a weapon used in a war to “end all wars” and to “promote peace,” was a deep global fear.

On that Lenten morning, it became very clear to me that the fear that gripped the world during the Cold War was not a fear that was limited to my own generation. Perhaps the Boomers in the room didn’t think that a Gen Xer could possibly understand the fear that was rampant in the Cold War. I see now that the fear we felt in the Cold War was something that extended across generations. I understand now that I was not the only one afraid to sleep, not the only person terrified by an annihilation that the media wanted us to believe was impending. Instead, I realized that we all inherited the global concern and fear that comes as the price for having unleashed such a powerful weapon.

What strikes me now is that I first presented this quote in Lent, and found myself asking these questions that are true of Jesus’ time in the desert and true of our time in the Cold War. There is a tie between hard times, times of trial, times in the darkness and in the wilderness. I believe we were met with one of these times during the Cold War. These are my thoughts on Teller’s quote from my blog, posted before Ash Wednesday, 2009:

How do we move ahead in those times when we don’t know the ending? How do we bravely face moving ahead into these days as we examine our lives, our thoughts and our hearts? While each of us may have dark hours and tough times, we may be met with disappointments and hardships, faith keeps us true. Perhaps one of the big lessons in the time of Lent is learning to lean into that faith. Feeling with our whole being that even when we don’t know how the story ends, we will be held in capable hands. Hands that hold us tight and safe or hands that push us along to our own potential and our dreams. Hands that made each of us. Hands of the One who loves us, totally, completely, and abundantly.

Teller’s quote helps answer the question of how we move forward even though all of the generations after the end of World War II have been met with dark hours and tough times. The decision to use a destructive weapon had dire consequences and created ripples of emotion that would take decades to resolve. In fact, we may not have seen the true “end” to the story yet. Perhaps Edward Teller had already begun to wrestle with the ideas that the generations during the Cold War have encountered. Perhaps in inventing the bomb, he’d already met the fear of nuclear destruction head on, and settled the score with God in his own mind. Revisiting the words of Edward Teller brings all the more meaning after contemplating his story, and considering the effects of nuclear warfare on the world. His words bring hope to us as the generations move forward together:

"When you come to the end of all the light you know, and it’s time to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things shall happen: Either you will be given something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly."

A Coffee Filter Wreath

2011-07-07T06:00:00.000-07:00

I'd been looking for a new wreath for our place. After looking around a bit at blogs for ideas, I found that some people had been using interesting materials to them. I decided to try my hand at making one out of .... coffee filters! There's no sewing, and it's super easy to do! I'm loving how this looks :)

Here's how you can make a coffee filter wreath of your own. You'll want to gather:
- a foam wreath from a craft store
- 50 or so coffee filters, I used the non-bleached kind.
- some muslin or fabric
- corsage pins, at least 2 inches long
- shells
- velvet ribbon

1. I took about 50 filters and placed them in a tupperware bowl with old coffee grounds. The idea is that it gives them some differentiation in colors and ads interest. After they'd all sat for an hour or so, I took them out and dried them in the sun.

2. A white foam wreath as the base for the project. I picked this up at Jo-ann's for about $5. Here it is with the filters.

3. I used scrap muslin I found at the craft store for $1.75 to cover the foam. Rip the muslin into 3 inch strips to give it a rustic look. It took four long strips to cover the wreath. I pinned the muslin on with corsage pins.

4. With the filters now dried, I began forming rosettes with each one. You can do this by grabbing the center,and twisting the filter.

5. Once you have the rosette formed, place a corsage pin through the little tail that is formed. The pin holds the flower's shape. And you can use the pin to place the rosette on the wreath. Bonus!

6. With all of the rosettes done, start pinning the flowers on the wreath. To spread the rosettes out evenly so the coverage was about the same all over the wreath.

7. Work from the center so you get even coverage.

8. I then took some shells glue gunned on to a velvet ribbon and used them to add more decoration to the wreath. The velvet ribbon gets pinned to the wreath to hold the shells in place.

9. Tie another piece of muslin around the top of the wreath and hang!

Shared on: Somewhat Simple

Gluten Free Tuesday: Glutino Gluten Free Yogurt Covered Pretzels

2011-07-06T16:04:00.000-07:00

As far as the gluten free brands go, Glutino consistently offers tasty treats that easily compete with their wheat-filled counterparts. I LOVE these yogurt covered pretzels. They completely capture the buttery goodness of regular pretzels, and the sweet yum of yogurt.

The only sad part? Whole Foods insists on stocking these on the top shelf of the chips aisle, making it impossible for me to retain my dignity as I try to snag this delicious snack.

How to Plan a Retreat: Locations and Budget Thoughts

2011-07-04T06:00:00.000-07:00

This installation of the "How to Plan a Retreat" series takes a break from some of the step by step instructions. Today we're going to dive into some of the resources that go into planning a retreat. I know first hand that budgets for retreats are often slim.

When you look at it, there are three major ways that you might need to think about budgeting when you're planning or leading a retreat.

1. Fees covered by individual retreatents - as the leader, you're going to need to list out all of the expenses, and then divide by the number of people attending. That gives you your break even point. On the upside, this method allows you to hold your retreat wherever you'd like. On the downside, it requires that someone be a book keeper and help keep an eye on budget, and you'll need to prepare or plan meals and room and board for everyone.

2. Basic fees are set by a retreat center, your group has to cover for supplies - in this scenario, you're working with a retreat center (or a hotel) and they have a set rate for the nights you stay over, and the meals. Your team needs to assess costs for supplies, speakers, and books or materials to add on top of the basic fees.

3. All in one package - Your group is signing up at a luxe retreat center, and all you need to do is pay a flat fee and then attend in style. They may allow you to bring in a speaker and use their facilities, in that case you'd need to figure payment for your speaker and any supplies they might require.

So, friends, what are some of those expenses you might run in to? Let's look over a hopefully fairly full list:
- cost per room per night, considering both single and double occupancy. I encourage you to look to offer both. Some folks like to pay a little less and room with a friend.
- food and snacks - plan on meals to cover the time period you're there. And, you may want to inquire of your attendees if anyone has food limitations. This is a good thing to ask on a registration form. Don't forget a midnight snack if you're having a social event!
- drinks - including water, coffee, soda, possibly alcohol - for an evening social
- folder or binders with a schedule, information, etc
- notepads for journaling
- speakers' fees - it's a nice gesture to offer your main speaker a stipend
- speakers' room and board
- clergy room and board
- musician or music fees - for live or recorded music
- scholarships - some retreats offer a 'scholarship' for a set number of people who may not be able to afford their own way
- supplies for activities - these are all going to be fairly activity specific, and lists should be drawn up by your activity leaders. I actually recommend giving the leaders a set price point, so you can move forward with covering costs long before your fliers are printed
- worship supplies - candles, small items for services
- room and equipment rental - will you be using an additional room or meeting space not covered by your initial fees?

Once you've created your list, run it past your retreat team. It's always good to have another set of eyes to review the costs.

Zoom Friday: A Library for a Little One

2011-07-01T06:00:00.000-07:00

Zoom has really enjoyed reading books for awhile now. We kept his books in various places throughout the house, some mixed in with toys, and others upstairs in his room. We've reached the stage where he likes to get in to things in the living room, and since he's pulling himself up, anything on the coffee table or side tables gets moved the floor in a quick fashion.

Instead of being constantly frustrated, I decided to turn Zoom's fascination with the shelf below the side table into an opportunity to provide him a place for his little library. Here's the serene and organized view of his books:

And here's Zoom exploring his books. You can see that he likes to get everything out to see it all:

Zoom's favorite is the "Colors and Shapes (BABY TOUCH & FEEL)" book that I picked up on a whim. His favorite pages are the one with the orange, and the peas. He likes the sparkly center of the star / cookie, too. Here he is showing us his favorite book:

What have you done to make your space work better for your little one?

A Rainbow of a Day

2011-06-29T15:11:00.000-07:00

Today I went in to San Francisco to see my dentist. Last December when I went in, they found my first cavity EVER. Today I got it filled. I have no words of wisdom on how to go 39 years without a cavity. I was the child who never brushed her teeth and I still don't like to floss. Good genes and good luck are all I can site.

I went shopping after I got done with the dentist. And I came across this line up of colorful scooters, which just seem oh so San Francisco.

I bought a black skirt, black pants, striped tank, and a plaid outfit for Zoom. We'll do a fashion show for everyone soon :)

Gluten Free Tuesday: Gluten Free Bisquick

2011-06-28T06:41:00.000-07:00

Last year, Bisquick came out with a gluten free version, and I must say, it's become a staple at our house. I don't need to tell you all the things that Bisquick can do; but I will say that this version of Bisquick is as tasty and reliable as the original.

In the last couple of months, I've seen Gluten Free Bisquick in various locations such as Safeway, Lucky, Target, and some of the smaller local markets. If you're going to be picking some up, be sure to check the price. One night, we saw it at Safeway for around $7.50 for a single box. If you get a "subscription" for it from Amazon, you can get it for less than $4 a box. I've set myself up for a subscription so I don't have to think about re-ordering.

To date, I've used Bisquick to make biscuits and pizza crust. And I made their Impossibly Easy Coconut Pi e at Thanksgiving, which was a real treat.

Betty Crocker (makers of Bisquick) also has a bunch of recipes on their site. I'm thinking I may need to try their Strawberry Shortcake this summer. It sounds delicious!

Monday Reflections: All of Life is Holy Ground by Craig Taubman

2011-06-27T06:00:00.000-07:00

Recently, we went to an outdoor music festival at the Los Gatos Jewish Community Center. We're always on the lookout for interesting events that offer music because Zoom loves it so much. We happened to get there in time to hear Craig Taubman, an artist out of LA and who came up to Norcal for this event.

I loved his music, especially the song "Holy Ground," which you can see here on You Tube (complete with liturgical dancing!)

There was a magical moment for me, sitting on the grass, holding sweet little Zoom, and listening to this song. It really hit home that these are the things that I want to teach him. To love, respect, delight, and embrace all of creation. To use his words to praise and love others. To look for the beauty in everything he encounters. To understand that everything, everyone is Holy, and all of it is Holy because it was all created by God.

Taubman's lyrics are simple and inspired. I hope to be able to use this song in a retreat sometime since it speaks such a deep, universal, spiritual truth. I've found myself listening to it on repeat in the car to and from work. Plain and simple, it makes me happy and makes me feel grounded.

All of Life is Holy Ground*
Every second, every minute, every hour, every day
Every thing, everyone, every place, every way
Where you walk
Where you stand
Where you love
Where you praise
All of life is Holy Ground

Every he, every she, every what, every who
It's in her, its in them, it's in me, it's in you
In the bitter, in the sweet, in the calm and in the storm
All of life is Holy Ground

*reprinted here with permission from Craig Traubman

Zoom Friday: Tea with Ladies and More Plum Updates!

2011-06-24T01:13:00.000-07:00

On Thursday, Zoom and I ventured in to San Francisco with Nola (his Grandma, my Mom). We stopped off at Samovar Tea Room for lunch. It's got such a light, airy feel, and has delicious food. Zoom had apples, some of Nola's sandwich, and a lot of puffs. He loved it and was well behaved the whole time.

Then we went to SFMOMA and saw the Stein Collects exhibit. It's the collection of the Stein family (Gertrude Stein being the most famous member of the family), and it was amazing. While the Steins were American (from SF!), they moved to Paris and while there, collected impressionist and modern artists' work. They became close friends with many of the artists and had work by Cezanne, Matisse, and Picasso in their private collections, hanging in their homes. Just breath taking. It made me want to buy art by current artists, just to have beautiful things in our house.

Zoom saw some of the art, but it wore him out.

In other Zoom news, my sister pointed out that he's also on the rules page of the Plum contest... again, with the hilarious captions :) And, I think he's going to be in some banner ads on Babble, and other blogging sites.

Here's the rules page:

Happy Friday, everyone! Have any fun plans for this weekend? I think we might go to the BEACH!

Zoom-tastic! Zoom on the Plum Organics website!

2011-06-22T12:34:00.000-07:00

Little Zoom recently was part of a photoshoot and today we can share his big modeling debut. He's on the front page of the Plum Organics website! Check him out - and be sure to enter their "Babies for Yum" contest on Facebook.

Our shoot was about two months ago, and we had a wonderful time meeting some of the people at Plum and working with a local ad agency. Plum Organics really do care about their food, and the babies that eat it. It's all organic, and I have to say, it tastes amazing (yes, I try everything I feed Zoom just so I know what it tastes like). Zoom ate Plum before the shoot and we LOVE their products. We were really excited to be a part of their campaign.

On Courage and Fear

2011-06-22T00:32:00.000-07:00

"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear" - Meg Cabot

Gluten Free Tuesday: Pasta 'Skillet'

2011-06-21T05:30:00.000-07:00

Another gluten free favorite at our house is something we call "skillet." I picked this up on another gluten free blog and it's been a solid addition to our dinner rotation.

It's an easy one - you need:
- 1 pound of ground beef
- Italian seasoning
- 1 package of gluten free pasta
- 1 jar of gluten free pasta sauce
- shredded cheese (cheddar works well)
- diced tomatoes (we use canned)

You'll want to brown the ground beef, and cook it so it's crumbly. I often add Italian seasoning, or rosemary / cilantro / oregano and a little bit of garlic salt. Or fresh garlic. Either works.

Once you have the ground beef underway, start boiling the water for the pasta.
At the same time, pre-heat your oven at 350 degrees.

The nice thing about this dish is that you can use basically any gluten free pasta. I get picky about flavor / texture in other dishes, but because you are combining the pasta and cooking it again, it doesn't seem to matter what kind of gluten free pasta you use.

The pasta should be cooked al dente, or a little tough. You don't want cook it all the way through.

Place the pasta in the bottom of a 9x9 oven safe dish. Take the ground beef (drain the grease off) and place it on top of the pasta. Then add the full jar of pasta sauce, the diced tomatoes, and stir. You'll need to eyeball this a bit; you want there to be a little room left so that the contents of the dish aren't spilling over the sides. Once you've got everything mixed, add cheese to the top.

Place in the oven for about 20 minutes or until the cheese is melted and a little browned.

Do you have any favorite gluten free dishes?

The Wisdom of My Father on Big Decisions

2011-06-17T12:15:00.000-07:00

Growing up, my Dad always encouraged me to dream big and work hard to make those dreams a reality. When I decided I wanted to go back to Divinity School for a Master's in Religion, it happened to coincide with a bad breakup with a long term boyfriend. My first choice of schools was all the way across the country. As we talked about my options and possible decision, my Dad said "Paula, its a big decision and we will always support the decisions you make. Please make sure that you are running towards something you want for your life, and not running away from something else."

This little tidbit helped confirm my decision, and I often use my Dad's words as a compass to make sure I'm following my own heart in life's big decisions. Am I running towards something with the excitement of new things to learn, new possibilities? Or am I turning tail and running away, backing down from who I am and what I have come here to do with my life?

The answer to my Divinity School question was that I was running, arms open, towards what I needed to do with my life. It was a big decision. It was the right decision. And I'm so grateful my Dad asked such a lovely question to make sure I was following my dreams.

Zoom Friday: 9 Months Old

2011-06-16T23:23:00.000-07:00

It may be a strange time to start this up, but I thought it would be fun to start doing a monthly recap, corresponding to Zoom's monthly birthdays. I'm borrowing this particular format from That Wife and thank her whole-heartedly for the inspiration!

Nicknames: Zoom, Doodle, Bunny, Poodle
Temperament: Quite Curious, crawling to explore new things, happy most of the time
Things I Could Do Without: The occasional screaming when you're tired, or having to pull you away from the cords because you like to chew on them.
Item/Toy We Love The Most: The little freebie umbrella stroller, it's nice to be able to take you on a walk whenever.
Items/Toys You Love The Most: Noah's Arc or the Shapes Book I gave you when we went to Arizona.You love the big pink bear named Dandee and the Lambie, too.
Things I’m Loving Most Right Now: You crawl towards us so excitedly when we pick you up from day care, your complete joy when you're laughing, your intensity when you're trying to figure out new things.
Things You’re Loving Most Right Now: You love the light switch and know how to turn off the lights. You love the wipes box (still) and will open and shut that for a long time. And you love staring at the board books and turning the pages. The juicy orange picture and the purple flower picture are your favorites.
Sounds/Words: You make sounds like Mumumum and Daadaadaa, and bwob. These aren't sounds you've connected to anyone or anything yet. You like to "sing" which is nonsense sounds you make when music is playing. And you make a screeching noise that I think I accidentally taught you.
Foods you like: Cantaloupe juice is your favorite. You like yogurt a lot, and started finger foods (puffs) this month, which you love. You really try just about anything, like tonight you had black beans, rice, tomato, and some tortilla. I'm glad you're OK with trying foods of all flavors and textures.
New this month: You've been crawling on your knees, and you can army crawl really quickly. You understand questions and respond in actions to them. You can hold my hand when I ask, turn off the light, and you understood that you could touch the orange in the book when I told you. You pull yourself up, and yesterday Daddy found you standing in the Pack 'n Play laughing at the fan.

A Heavenly Nap: Angel in the Shade at San Damiano

2011-06-15T09:32:00.000-07:00

A happy, slumbering angel in the garden at San Damiano. I'd love to curl up like this for a nap and unwind in the peace of a heavenly place.

Redoing the Bins in our Side Table

2011-06-13T07:39:00.000-07:00

Spicing up the little side table that I moved under our stairs was a multi-faceted project. If you recall, the table looked like this when it first was placed under the stairs:

I'd bought the bins specifically for the table in it's new home, but I found their overly-matchy nature distracting once they were in the table. I wished I could find something unique, with all of the bins having a similar color scheme. And, I wanted something that matched our style and our home.

Then I went to Target and fell in love the with fabric in this table runner. Yellow has been one of my favorite colors for a very long time. These patterns were just bohemian enough to be fun, yet planned enough to look polished. I thought about it - why not cut one of these up and use it to recover the bins .... ???

I went home and had a discussion with my assistant. He quickly demonstrated how easy it would be to disassemble the bins and prepare them for a new cover.

After I measured out the cuts, I used a glue gun to attach the fabric. I also used some cloth napkins to cover the sides and back, those portions that wouldn't be seen from the front of the sofa table. To finish off the bottom, I cut pieces of felt and glued those to the bottom. I wanted a smooth surface that would allow the bins to slide easily on the shelves.

Here are the redone bins from the front. See the grosgain ribbon on the bin on the upper left? I love how that turned out, it's actually covering a rough edge. I ended up using the very last part of the scraps on the smallest bin. I lucked out in remembering that I had it handy, I feel like the white ribbon really helps tie in with the white of the table.

And here they are inside the table. I really like the vibe of the classic table lines and the funky bin fabric.

I still love getting to see the table in it's new location, and really glad that we have a spot for all of Zoom's stuff, along with other things like fabric shopping bags, camera cases, and some shoes near the door.

Linking up to: DIY Showoff, Sugar Bee Crafts, Ginger Snap Crafts

Featured on Eisy Morgan and Bella Before & After

2011-06-12T11:21:00.000-07:00

As you guys know, I like doing crafty things around the house to make our home look a little more like us :) I'm trying to find the balance of what I talk about here, amongst the retreat leading, the baby, and the home. Honestly, all of these things inspire me. That's why I love to talk about them.

It's cool when another blogger features you, so I thought I'd give two a little shout out here and give them both a special thanks for spreading the love on their blogs.

Back in May, the Bulletin Board post was featured on Bella Before & After. Bella's blog is lovely, and she really embodies the spirit of encouragement. She loves to feature her own home improvement projects and roots for all of us who are also trying to DIY our way to a lovely place to live.

This month, Ashley at Eisy Morgan featured my side table redo. Ashley's blog has a warm, welcoming tone, and you can just tell she's a genuinely friendly person. She's a California girl living in Colorado, which is a flip flop of me! (OK, OK, I only lived in Colorado for 3 months after I was born there...)

I want to thank both of these lovely ladies for stopping by and for hosting such fun linky parties :)

Zoom Friday: 'Crawling' and 'Dancing'

2011-06-10T00:46:00.000-07:00

Zoom has been quite busy working on some new skills. Over the past few weeks he's learned to "army crawl." In the last week he's gotten quite quick and made his way into the kitchen. One of the funnier moments was when he started yelling at the refrigerator. I fed him after that and it seemed that he was yelling about food.

Here's a little footage of him "crawling," and grabbing a shoe. Inevitably he always wants to get into something he shouldn't!

We also went to another music festival last weekend. Zoom loved the music, and when he was standing (he still holds on to someone or something when he stands) he started moving his legs around to the beat. I'd never seen him "dance" before, but it was a great start! I can't wait until he can really get moving :) You can see a little of it here.

Happy Friday! I hope you all have a great weekend :)

And there's this to contend with...

2011-06-08T14:45:00.000-07:00

This just in. Zoom is now able to pull himself up and stand unassisted. In other news, he is also wearing pants sized 24 months that clearly are a tripping hazard. Bad combo, mom, bad combo.

Easy Dwell Studios Inspired Accent Art

2011-06-06T23:31:00.000-07:00

Last week I revealed the little re-do I did under our stairs, and I made reference to an easy art project I did to lighten up the space. A couple of years ago, I found a triptych style frame at Pier One in the clearance bin. It was scratched up, and it was missing glass in one of the frames, and one of the backings for the frame was missing. It was marked down to $5.

A tiny bit of paint, some glass from another frame, and some cardboard and the frame was like new. And then it sat for awhile after we moved.

The frame was the perfect width to fit over the side table, and so I got to figuring out the way to make it work.

Sean bought me these cool Dwell Studios Mandala place mats from Target for my birthday and I immediately knew I wanted the pattern to be something that was on display all of the time. I snapped 3 photos of them on my iPhone and dropped them into Instagr.am, and then printed them and popped them in to the frame. A little grosgrain ribbon, and voila! Updated art on the cheap!

Sharing on: Not just a Housewife, Sugar bee crafts, The DIY Showoff, Gingersnap Crafts, Somewhat Simple

Stations of the Cross: Remember Also Those of Ill Will

2011-06-06T00:03:00.000-07:00

At our "Living Joy to the Fullest" retreat, we took part of the afternoon to walk the stations of the cross. San Damiano's stations are set in a gorgeous outdoor oak grove. Growing up, I never walked the Stations. I don't know if it's just not Lutheran (the whole no idols thing perhaps?) or what. In fact, I don't think I really understood the Stations until I went to Israel and saw the actual Stations of the Cross in the streets in Jerusalem.

Since then, I've walked it many times, which is something that always gives me great reason to pause and take in the enormity of what this walk represents. Jesus' final journey is something both foretold and inescapable. It is humbling and horrifying. It is a death sentence, and yet it is freeing. It is love beyond my Earthly comprehension, and in it's last moments (Father, Father, why have you foresaken me?) it is as human as any moment in all of creation. I could write volumes on that moment, of Jesus crying out. It rocks me to my foundation and I can get lost thinking about it.

As a group, we read a meditation from the Vatican at each Station, and took the time to think about Jesus, those around him, and the Romans. When we ended, I read this poem, which was written at the time of the Holocaust. The stories of it's origins are varied. It may have been found in a concentration camp, on a deceased child, in her pocket. It is moving. It seemed to tie with Jesus' last journey and the forgiveness and love that he altruistically portrayed for all of us.

O Lord, remember not only the men and women of good will, but also those of ill will.

But, do not remember all of the suffering they have inflicted on us;

remember the fruits we have borne thanks to this suffering —

our fellowship, our loyalty to one another, our humility, our courage,

our generosity, the greatness of heart that has grown from this trouble.

When our persecutors come to judgment, let all of these fruits

which we have borne be their forgiveness. - Author Unknown

Zoom Friday: Zoom's Favorite Playtime Things

2011-06-03T00:42:00.000-07:00

Recently, Zoom started to show a preference for certain toys. You can tell because his face lights up when he sees them, and he snuggles his face into them (well at least the stuffed animals). Now Zoom seems to genuinely prefer three toys - his pink Valentine Bear named Dandee, his white Gund snuggly lamb from Auntie Cris, and his new Noah's Ark.

Here's the first day that Zoom met Dandee. Love at first site! You can see how pleased he is to have found this enormous bear :)

Zoom also adores this white lamb that Cris brought the first time she visited.

And, the latest and greatest craze at our house is over this Noah's Ark. It makes noises. It has wheels. The giraffe sounds like a donkey. Amazing things happen on the ark!

Zoom's favorite playmates are his cousins. Here they are in the park last weekend. Zoom and Bella chat about the red ball.

And here's Ralph, stealing the show by butting in to the photo with Zoom and Bella (who look oh so serious...). This picture is so very Ralphie. What a funny boy!

So, what should we name the white cuddly lambie?

Our Deepest Fear Is That We Are Powerful

2011-06-01T23:31:00.000-07:00

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that frightens us most.
We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and famous?’
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that people won’t feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It’s not just in some of us; it’s in all of us.
And when we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. Maryanne Williamson

Old Table Re-do: A Media Stand Becomes an Entry Way Table

2011-06-01T00:02:00.000-07:00

We had an media stand that worked well in our old apartment. It was exactly the width of the space that held our TV. When we moved, we found that the TV seemed perched rather precariously on it. Add a baby to the mix and I knew we needed to find a new home for the media stand.

Here's the precariously placed TV. Now that Zoom has started pulling himself up, I'm really glad we no longer have a heavy TV on it.

We have this area under the stairs, that really needed some help. The space had become a storage area for whatever came in to the house (since it's just inside the front door). And, this is the view I see when I sit on the couch:

Zoom has enough stuff that it seemed this area would be good staging space for the diaper bag, baby shoes, etc. I bought some bins, moved the furniture, and cleaned up everything under the stairs. Which got me here:

Still a little dark for my tastes, and the color and matchy-ness of the bins made it feel a little too "candy store." I decided to paint the table white. It took a coat of Kilz primer and two coats of white interior semi-gloss paint. This is the table at the half way point, we brought it in overnight.

And finally, finally, the table was done, and placed under the stairs and I decided to redo the bins!! The drawer pulls are from Anthropologie. The art above the table is something I made from photos of a place mat, and the other decor pieces are from around our home.

A detail of the top of the table:

And a before and after:

I love the mood of this little corner of our home now. The project took awhile to pull together, and I'll do another post on the bins and the art above the table. It was really satisfying to have the space finished and functional.

Submitted to Linky parties at: Lil' Luna, Eisy Morgan, My Girlish Whims, Not Just a Housewife

Gluten Free Recipe: Delicious Coffee Cake

2011-05-31T08:18:00.000-07:00

I've passed the two and a half year mark in being gluten free and I'm just now experimenting with recipes. It's taken awhile to get comfortable with the basics ... but recently I wanted to make a coffee cake. A moist, delicious, insane coffee cake. Guess what!? It worked.

At brunch, Sean and my sister (they eat gluten) all raved about it, which is really what I love to hear. If the gluten eaters in a group say it's good and they can't tell a difference? Then you've got a gluten free winner!

I'd been having a lot of good experiences with the Gluten Free Pantry brand by Glutino. I picked up a pack of their white cake mix to make this recipe, which I modified from All Recipes:

Ingredients
1 (15 ounce) package yellow cake mix by Gluten Free Pantry
1 (3.4 ounce) package instant vanilla pudding mix by Jello
1 (3.4 ounce) package instant butterscotch pudding mix by Jello
4 eggs
1 cup water
1 cup vegetable oil
1 cup packed brown sugar
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
1/2 cup fine chopped pecans

Directions
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease a 9x13 inch baking pan, or a 10 inch Bundt cake pan.
2. In a medium bowl, stir together the cake mix, vanilla pudding mix, and butterscotch pudding mix.
3. Add the eggs, oil and water, mix until well blended.
4. In another bowl, stir together the brown sugar, cinnamon and nuts.
5. Pour half of the nut mixture in the top of the Bundt pan (so the topping will come out on the top)
6. Pour half of the batter into the pan, on top of the nut mixture.
7. Cover the "middle" section with the remaining nut mixture.
8. Pour in the rest of the cake mix over the nuts.
9. Bake for 20 minutes in the preheated oven, then turn the oven down to 325 degrees F (165 degrees C) and bake for an additional 35 to 40 minutes.

Make sure that you check the ingredients to confirm that they don't include gluten.

I find that this cake keeps well in the refridgerator for several days and freezes well, too.

Zoom Friday: Weekend Fun, Lemons and a Music Festival

2011-05-27T00:28:00.000-07:00

This last weekend, we had time at home for a lot of family fun. Saturday afternoon was lazy. We hung out in the dining room and backyard, and picked our first lemon from our dwarf Ponderosa tree. For some reason, there wasn't a lot of juice in the lemon, but Zoom honestly liked chewing on it. We laughed as he chewed and then would pucker up, surprised at the flavor.

On Sunday, we packed up and got into the car and headed to Los Gatos for a Jewish Music Festival. Zoom has always liked music, and really loves to see people performing, so we took a risk and went. It was a nice afternoon; there was good music, we had ice cream, and there was great people watching. Zoom loved the banana cinnamon ice cream, and the three of us lounged about on our picnic blanket and took in the afternoon.

Linked In, Liked, Retweeted, and Friended: Finding God and Oneself in the Digital Age

2011-05-26T08:02:00.000-07:00

We're starting work on the upcoming weekend retreat in August, and I've been playing with the title and write up. Father Rusty, the Friar / Priest who will be leading the retreat came across "The Facebook Sonnet" that was recently published in the New Yorker. You should read it, really, its quite haunting and real.

Along these same lines, I find myself drawn to some of the words in Pink's song "F*cking Perfect," which also seems to address some of the angst of the age; the feeling that we are not perfect, that we are constantly "Mistreated, misplaced, missundaztood, Miss "no way it's all good".' I love the message of that song, that we are in fact perfect, just the way we are. Pink is always so raw and spot on with her songs!

Here's my working write up for the retreat - With social networking and connectivity often fueling and informing our personal lives, we find ourselves blessed with the ability to keep in touch with friends and family, wherever they are. The digital age has brought new angles to relationships, to communication, to the way we even see ourselves. Now more than ever we have the ability to broadcast our own lives and express ourselves through a multitude of platforms.

With this new social landscape, how do we see ourselves? How do we find God and Jesus in the midst of the digital noise? What is the relevance of the message from 2000 years ago in today's electronic world?

Our weekend long retreat will look at the quickening pace of our lives, the impact of constantly being linked in, and the draw of being "liked," and friended. We will have time for discussion, small group work, and presentations. We will look at the life and of a Man who started the original Social Network, and who's message was so revolutionary that his words have deep meaning across the Millennia.

So, what do you think? Do you have anything to add?

The Confusion Around 'Black Friday'

2011-05-25T00:01:00.000-07:00

I am really excited to share this column with you guys - it originally appeared in catapult magazine in April. It's a little bit of a departure from some of what I share here, but here goes :) Enjoy!

Three co-workers stood unpacking Easter merchandise in a retail store early one morning, shooting the breeze as they opened boxes and talking about what they found inside.

“Check this out, we finally have enough merchandise to do an Easter display,” said Sean, the store manager.

“Well, I’m an atheist and I don’t really care what we put on display. I don’t celebrate the birth of Jesus on Easter,” says Jeff. Then he quickly questioned his statement asking, “Wait, when was Jesus born?”

“I believe that would be Christmas,” said Sean, slightly sarcastically.

“So what’s Easter? Is that when Jesus died?” Realizing he’d already made a rather epic error, Jeff wanted to try to get some of these facts down correctly.

“No, Jesus died on Black Friday,” said Andy, convinced he was correct.

“No, dude, you have it wrong, Black Friday is when you get good deals on TVs, not when Jesus died,” responded Jeff.

“Jesus died on Good Friday,” explained Sean, “and Easter is the day Jesus was resurrected from the dead.”
With the boxes unpacked, Jeff and Andy began putting the merchandise out, and Sean texted me from his office to share the story.

I love this story because it brings to light something that is happening in our society. It’s a snapshot of the conversations around water coolers, lunch rooms and stock rooms. It’s a growing trend that many people claim to be atheist or agnostic and, that as a culture, we know more about the civic celebration that bookend religious holidays. Lent has disappeared behind the party of Mardi Gras, the true meaning of Christmas is muddied by the excitement of cheap TVs, and All Saints Day sits in the shadow of Halloween.

How is it that we find ourselves in this place where secular culture seems to overshadow religion? Are people so intimidated by the dates and perceived rules of organized religion that they no longer feel the church holds a place for them? Is it a natural progression of the generations, with Gen X questioning authority, and Gen Y and the Millennials being a defined as the “Me” generations that is causing us to be so self-defining that we no longer see a need God?

The answers to these questions might be found in a new understanding, or perhaps a purposeful revisiting of, Jesus.

Ironically, what seems to be missing for today’s younger people is an understanding of the original radical spirit of Jesus. If we take away the rituals, the memorization of Saints and scripture read from the King James Version, we find again the founder of the Church. Jesus was a true rebel in his time, who dared to love all people, who was seeking equality for all people, who saw the connectedness of all people. Jesus threw out the old rules, and was even so bold as to state that there were only two rules: to love God and to love your neighbor as yourself, which flew vehemently in the face of the traditions of his own time.

What could be more relevant in today’s world than a leader who questioned the status quo, interacted with people of all classes, of all races, no matter how “appropriate” others deemed them? What could be more timely than a man looking to end poverty? What is more motivational than a man who publicly admits he loves others, and who will die for the people he loves, all the while forgiving those who kill him?

If today’s atheists and non-believers could look past the rituals, the songs, the traditions, the stereotypes of Christianity and organized religion, what they would find is a message of love brought to us by a man who is as relevant today as he was over 2000 years ago.

We see the truth of this story in the resurrection, as it is the end (and beginning) of a gorgeous love story. It is the story of a Father who loves his children, of a Son who loves his Father. It is heart wrenching and life affirming in the same breath. It is the recognition of sorrow and promise of joy. It is the story of humanity, it is the story of each of our lives.

The resurrection is God’s love, alive. The call I hear in this is to work every day to be a small representation of that love, alive in God’s creation. I have studied the Bible, I know the songs, I’ve memorized the dates and I can hold my own with the traditions. But, instead of leaning on those things, each day, I try to find a way to share Love with others. This love inspires me to be my best at work, to love my family unapologetically, to smile at strangers, to really listen to my friends and to be accepting of all people just as they are. These are the things that people respond to, and these are the things that Jesus taught us when saying we should love others as ourselves. And, these are the things that I imagine Jesus would do and teach if he was walking among us today.

Zoom Friday: Zoom Goes to a Wedding

2011-05-19T23:25:00.000-07:00

This last weekend, we went to Tucson for my cousin's wedding. It was a trip of many firsts for little Zoom. He went on an airplane, he got to see some live music, he went to a wedding, he wore a suit with a bow tie, and he went swimming.

The travel was fairly uneventful. Zoom didn't seem to mind the airplane. A couple times he let out a loud, ear piercing cry that I swear he never does at home. And of course, he screamed just long enough for another passenger to mutter, "Oh good grief." Then, bless his heart, Zoom fell asleep. Look, here he is in the terminal!

There was a live band at the rehearsal dinner. Zoom was mesmerized, watching them. He stared at the drummer. He smiled at the leader singer. Zoom and I danced together to "My Girl," but I think he liked staring at the musicians best.

On Saturday, we got all dressed up and went to the wedding! It took place outdoors on a lovely lawn with stunning views of the Catalina mountains. Zoom's twin cousins were also in attendance! The kiddos all got a little rowdy during the ceremony, so we excused ourselves to the back of the lawn and proceeded to have a family photo shoot!

On both Saturday and Sunday, Zoom got to go swimming. He loved it! I've never seen him look so happy.

Then again, I'm pretty sure he was happy for a fun family vacation and seeing new sites.

Finding Inspiration in "Waterman Dave" of San Diego

2011-05-18T22:39:00.000-07:00

As part of our last retreat, we talked about the stories of some everyday heroes. We broke out into small groups and talked about the inspiration we can take from the actions of just one person. These people, by their generosity of spirit are walking examples of how one begins to live joy to the fullest; by giving what they can with altruism and love. One of these people is "Waterman Dave" from San Diego, California.

Waterman Dave is a retired 75 year old man living in San Diego, and every day he brings water and snacks to the homeless out of his car. He pays for the water and food out of his own pocket, and he's quite serious about ending homelessness in his city.

While as many as 70 cities nationwide are banding together to try and find homes for 100,000 people (the campaign is called 100,000 Homes), Dave sees that there hasn't been much of an impact on the daily lives of those homeless people he interacts with. In San Diego alone, there are more than 4,600 homeless people living on the streets. As is the case with many homeless throughout the US, these people are often mentally ill or abuse illegal substances.

Dave says that he's often the only person the homeless speak to on a daily basis, and many look forward to his visit. Dave is their connection to the rest of the world. Even while he is only bringing bottled water and simple snacks, Dave's hospitality spreads much further than the food and drink he provides.

A Wedding Prayer

2011-05-13T23:32:00.000-07:00

My cousin is getting married tomorrow and he and his wife to be asked me to say the prayer at their rehearsal dinner. My cousin is the closest thing my sister and I have to a brother. While we are years apart, we grew up close and share a lot of special memories. I'm super proud of who he is and the man he has become. Here's the prayer I said tonight.

Dear Lord
Thank you for this happy celebration of your most amazing gift, the gift of love
Thank you for friends and family
Thank you for bringing us all together for this weekend to celebrate this couple
Thank you for Ian and Sarah, and bless them as they stand on the threshold of a new part of their journey in this life.
Let them lean in to their love of you, of each other, and let this big crazy family gathered stand to bolster them in their life together, now and always.
Let us remember to slow down in these days, take a breath, and take in the sheer joy and love that surrounds us, surrounds Ian and Sarah. Let remember to soak in the tiny moments for they are fleeting.
Thank you for this meal and please bless it for our use. Bless those who helped prepare it and those who made this evening possible.
Dear Lord thank you for this life, this big family, this joyous time and this meal. In Jesus name we pray, amen.

A Walking Tour of Point Reyes Station, California

2011-05-06T23:16:00.000-07:00

Last weekend we were up north, spending a few days on the coast. One of our favorite little towns near Tomales Bay is Point Reyes Station. It's a tiny place, just one grocery store, a few shops and places to eat. Sean, Zoom and I wandered the town for a bit and I snapped photos on my iPhone. (My camera was ruined on the beach!)

We parked across the street from a pickup with a horse statue in the back. Someone had changed the sign from No Parking to No Barking:

The top of the building had great lines:

We stopped in a shop called "Flower Power," which made me giggle since it seemed to be a reference to San Francisco's "Summer of Love." Yet at the back of the store was this amazing, Italian inspired courtyard. Even the little birds near the chair were for sale. So inviting:

Another view of the courtyard at "Flower Power."I'd love to sit in that Adirondack sunning and imagine I'm in Tuscany:

Walking around Point Reyes Station, we saw a vintage car parked between some buildings that made for a nice picture:

Irises were in bloom on the street corner:

California Poppies mixed with morning glories made for lovely contrast. I'll have to remember this color combination for later, when I mix flowers in the back yard.

And, even the compost company had a quaint and well done office:

Do you have a favorite small town to visit?

Zoom Friday: A Letter to My Little Boy

2011-05-05T23:03:00.000-07:00

Dear Little Zoom,

Sunday will be our first mother's day together. While it's traditionally a day to celebrate your mom, I feel like it's also a day to celebrate you. I want to thank you for picking me to be your mother, for initiating me into this beautiful role. I would have never imagined what joy and love was to come into my life.

On Wednesday we went to a photo shoot. Someone (our friend Katey!) had seen your picture and asked if you would be in an advertisement. You were amazing all day, smiling, so happy, loving the whole experience, acting like a total natural. I kept looking at you sitting on the set, so tiny, and you seemed to say in your own way, "Mama, I'm just fine doing my own thing here. This is fun! Don't worry."

The sweetest moment for me was when the producer, who is pregnant and due near your birthday, was holding you. You'd been smiling at her all day and you'd really taken to her. And right then she said,"I hope my baby is just like you."

I got tears in my eyes when she said it, and tears now when I think about it. I know I had wondered so much what you'd be like before you were born. With every kick or punch I felt from you, I'd wonder about you. I had a deep seated feeling that you would be quite funny (and you are), and that you would love your Daddy in a crazy way (and you do). I remember seeing babies and wondering if you'd be like them. I was touched beyond belief that someone else would see you as I see you, as my sweet, loving baby.

Her words also reminded me to be so grateful of who you are every day. You are happy, you love to smile at people, you laugh easily, and seem to be completely comfortable with who you are.

I hope that I will always remember these days before you can crawl. Tonight you were rolling around between your Dad and I, laughing, kissing, growling at us. It was a perfect family moment, with you just being you.

I will do my best as your Mama to help you remember who you are, who you have always been, and who you were before you came to grace us with your presence. I will celebrate your amazing gifts, what makes you happy, and give you the wings you need to fly as high as you can dream. I know that your being in the world will change you. I know you will not be my tiny little one forever. Just the same, I know that we will remain special, close, kindred spirits.

Little Zoom, I love you and I'm astounded by everything you've already taught me. You are a blessing. Thank you for being my baby.

Love,
Your Mama

My Dream Job(s) and My Plan for Work

2011-05-02T22:59:00.000-07:00

For those readers that have been following me for awhile, you'll probably recall that my day to day job is a Project Manager. I've been working in advertising for about seven years, building websites and working in advertising agencies. It's like Mad Men meets The Social Network. (LOL, that makes it sounds so glamorous!)

When Zoom was born I didn't want to go back to my previous job for a couple of reasons. The first was the distance and the commute; my old job was across a bridge and about 45 miles away. It was horrible for the nine months I did it. And, frankly, the job was a really bad fit. I'll leave it at that.

In October, just a month after Zoom was born I very jokingly asked a friend if he might be hiring any Project Managers. And the answer was yes, but that the position might be temporary. I told him I wanted to learn more.

And so, in one of the worst economies in ages, with a baby and bills and a new car, I found myself actually contemplating making a jump into being a freelancer. I found myself really, seriously, thinking about what I wanted to do.

I knew that I really wished I could spend more time with Zoom. And as he gets older, I'd really love to be able to find a way to take off the summer off with him so he doesn't have to go to day camp or something for months on end. My friends who are teachers swing it so they have a summer off, and I love that they have that flexibility. As I started to think about freelancing, it occurred to me that I might be able to find the right jobs that allow me to make my own schedule.

And with all of these dreams in my head, I took the plunge and went freelance. So far, I love it. My current contract is for four days a week, and I'm working on rebranding and relaunching a website. My original contract was through the end of April, but it got extended through June because they liked me and wanted to keep me on a couple projects (instead of handing them back to the woman who returned from maternity leave).

My plan is to begin looking for a new contract at the end of May so I'll have about four weeks to firm something up. I have a good feeling about this, and I hope to keep the freelance thing going to see how I like it in other companies.

Do you have any advice? Have you ever freelanced?

Review: Gluten Free Pizza Dough by French Meadow Bakery

2011-04-29T21:44:00.000-07:00

Last time I was in Safeway (our grocery store) I noticed a special freezer section with several new gluten free items in it. All of them were by French Meadow Bakery, and I'd never tried any of their food before. I picked up a blueberry muffin and some of their frozen pizza dough.

The pizza dough comes in a two pack, each with their own little foil cooking tray, and they measure about 8 inches across.

Today I decided to try the pizza, and went with a standard sauce (Ragu is gluten free, and has no high fructose corn syrup), ground beef, and mozzarella cheese pizza. I cooked it for about 15 minutes at 450 degrees.

It came out looking quite lovely. If you are gluten free, you'll understand how excited I was to see that crispy crusty bit. Yum! We don't get a treat like that every day!

The crust was good, a little soggy, but the flavor was like a wheat-laden crust. It stayed together well (sometimes gluten free items are overly crumbly), and I'm looking forward to eating the second one sometime soon. The blueberry muffin was straight up delicious; that was eaten so quickly that there are no photos to share.

The crusts ran about $6 for two, and the blueberry muffing, while small, was $2. I happened upon a couple of $1 off coupons, and used them both for this purchase. You can still get a coupon on their site, as of the time this post was written. Enjoy!

Zoom Friday: Zoom Goes on Vacation to Dillon Beach

2011-04-28T23:28:00.000-07:00

This week we took Zoom to the beach for vacation. We tried out a new spot, Dillon Beach. We left on Easter after a lovely brunch with our family, and arrived at the rental house (found on VRBO) before sun down. We had lovely view of the beach and the sunset, and we felt the relaxation hit as we ate left over ham and split pea soup for dinner.

Zoom had been to the beach once before. Over Thanksgiving we visited La Selva, which is near Santa Cruz. He seemed to like it, even though he's never been a big fan of wind. Strangely, he makes little gulping noises when the wind hits him, like he's underwater. I guess he's not sure what to make of it.

He loved the beach this time, especially the sand. I love this photo, where he enthusiastically has just grabbed the sand on our second day out:

Today we found a wind break behind a sand dune and played there for a bit. He put fistfuls of sand in his mouth, destroyed the small castles we built, and even put his face down in the sand at one point on purpose. For him, everything was sheer joy. You could just see him take total delight in the new sites and sounds, the wind, and even the feeling of sand in his mouth.

He slept all the way home. I can't wait to take him to the beach again!

View of the Bay from a Parking Lot

2011-04-23T01:23:00.000-07:00

I was just going through some of my old photos on Flickr, and ran into these two. I used to work in San Francisco, and I'd drive in every day and park out on a pier. I loved working in the city, and I really liked being downtown.

This strange mannequin head is haunting, isn't it? I don't know why it was left on this fence, or who painted it. Off to the right is Pac Bell Park, home of the SF Giants :)

A different day, I really was drawn to the clean lines of these potties, all lined up and ready to be de"ported." (The puns and irony couldn't be any worse, right?) I'm pretty sure these were all out there for a fireworks show we have called Kaboom! There's some strange humor in that, really.

Happy Saturday, friends!

Zoom Friday: Lots of Laughs

2011-04-21T23:31:00.000-07:00

This week, Zoom discovered a couple of important things. He learned to wave, and he learned to shake his head in the "no" direction. The waving thing happened last weekend, almost like something clicked for him and he realized what it meant when we were flopping our arms around and saying, "Oh, hi." He doesn't quite have control of the motion, but he's really excited about it. On Saturday he was waving at me every time I came back in the room, so cute.

He also started shaking his head no, but I'm fairly sure he has no idea what it really means. Most of the time he'll look at either Sean or I, shake his head, and start laughing. One morning, Sean caught him trying to get into a crawling position in his crib, and when he saw Sean he started shaking his head, laughing.

This week I got a video of the little gentleman laughing his butt off. I don't know what prompted me to start filming, but you can tell that he's cracking me up; whenever the camera shakes I'm also laughing, trying really hard not to snort.

Here's Zoom, doing his thing:

Spring Flowers: Pink Tulips

2011-04-20T23:27:00.000-07:00

Happy Spring to you all! As you probably know, I really can't resist taking photos of flowers. Here are some of my favorite pink beauties in the spring - tulips, gerber daisies, camelias, and cherry blossoms. I hope you all have a wonderful Thursday :)

300th Post: A Recap of Welcoming Spirit

2011-04-19T22:10:00.000-07:00

This is my 300th post, and just today I hit 50 followers! I thought there would be no better way to celebrate the last two and a half years by looking at some of the highlights. One of my hopes in writing this blog was to find a place to write about leading retreats. I'm grateful for all of you have come along for the journey this far. :) Here are a few of my own favorite things:

My favorite posts have been those where I have shared something close to my heart with you all. Those at the top of the list for me have been:
The Breath of Life, the Wisdom of Ruah
Why I Love Softball and Growling at People
Love Holds a Mirror Up to All of Us
In the Job Description
Welcoming Music: Girl Sailor

Google lists the top visited posts on this blog as these five, and I have to say that it always makes me giggle to think lots of people are searching for the term "ugly Christmas sweaters." It's even funnier to me that it's my top viewed post, and yet, it does not have a single comment!
How to Make a Homemade Ugly Christmas Sweater
How to Plan a Retreat: Coming up With a Theme
How to Plan a Retreat: The Beginning
How to Plan a Retreat: Creating the Flyer
A Love Like That Lights Up the Whole Sky

I've made a few videos on this blog, and when I do a weekend long retreat, I really like to make a slideshow with pictures and images from the weekend. It's a little cheesey, yet these still makes me smile and think of the people who came to participate.
Oh Beauty, Ever Ancient
Spiritual Pilates

In the past two and a half years, I've led five weekend retreats and six day retreats. When I started this blog, I had just led my first weekend retreat with Father Rusty. Each time I'm asked to speak, I get giddy and nervous. And I love it.

Last year, I became the leader of the San Damiano Young Adult Ministry team after our previous leader, Kevin, "retired."

This year, San Damiano has asked me to join their Advisory Board, an invitation that humbles and delights me beyond words. San Damiano has become my second home. It is near my home town, and I feel completely at peace there. My prayer is that I can pay back to them all of the peace, love, and joy that they have given me.

I've received comments from a couple of published authors, and just thinking about them reading my words at all makes me goofball. It's like when we saw Leonardo DiCaprio at a restaurant in Malibu once. I walked past him seven times when pretending to go to the bathroom. Reaaaal smooth.

There have been almost 30,000 visitors to this blog. This also astounds me. I thank each of you that's come by and read a word, left a comment, spent a little time with me. I hope that your day was made a little brighter by your visit.

Over the next little bit, I'm hoping to do a thank you, and I'm working on a new "column" where I can share the stories of some of the people who inspire me. I'm working on the column now :)

And, while it's not officially a "Zoom Friday," I couldn't end this post of highlights without a mention of my two favorite guys. Sean is my amazing, wonderful, loving partner in this crazy world. And Zoom is my curious, hilarious, joyful baby. Here's his video debut, where he's exploring his world.

Thank you all for an amazing two and a half years! I cherish each of you!

Creating Cards to Share: A Retreat Activity

2011-04-16T22:14:00.000-07:00

At our last retreat, "Living Joy to the Fullest," we asked the participants to think of ways that they could do things for others. We were looking to ways to focus on how our actions can impact others, and bring joy to their lives, as well as our own. Kim and I are both big fans of card making, and so we decided to have a little creative breakout session. Instead of making cards for ourselves, though, we found three worthy causes to share our cards with: The St Raymond's Eucharistic Ministers, Nana's Box, and Afiveohfouruplifting. We let the retreatants know that we'd be donating the cards to these groups. Everyone was excited to create something beautiful to share with other people, even though these were people we'd never meet!

Here's the whole set of cards we made, which I will ship out on Monday!

And some lovely details on some of our cards. The man who made this card thoughtfully placed tied ribbons on the front to go with the "connection" theme in the quote:

I love this message because it reminds me of my friend, Father Rusty. He likes to reflect on the metaphor of dance and relationships. In order to dance, you have to agree to lead and follow, to listen, to move together, and all of it changes every second. He likens this to the relationships we have with each other, and with God. Isn't that lovely?

I'm super inspired by these and it's really got my wheels churning on an idea...

Zoom Friday: A Generous Kisser

2011-04-14T22:47:00.000-07:00

In addition to being a very good sitter, Zoom is a generous kisser. It started when he was quite young (as if he's "old" now); you'd ask for a kiss and you'd get a sloppy lick on the cheek. Now, he's more into what I call a "kiss-a-thon," which generally involves a very vigorous hug, and then some good solid smooches on the cheek, or forehead, whatever's available. And there's often growling. It's a thorough experience.

Sean took this set of photos this week. In any other situation, I probably wouldn't be excited about my chins in the first frame, but I can't say I care here. I actually asked Sean to send me the photos because I don't want to forget these little moments. I know Zoom won't be this size forever, and some day he probably won't want to kiss his mama with such sincere and joyful excitement.

I'd like to think that being a mom helps remind me of what's important. Being in the moment with Zoom is important. Babies have a remarkable way of living in the now, and by doing so, they remind us that we should spend more time in the moment ourselves. Guilt of the past, worries of the future, these things just rob us of the only moment we have, which is right now.

In many ways, Zoom is much a teacher for me as he is a student. We teach each other a lot, every day. I feel like our souls knew each other, somehow, before this lifetime. I wonder if by the simple fact that he was with God more recently than I was, that he brings with him the simple reminders of what it's like to sit with the Eternal. His never ending joy, his delight in simple things, his exuberant way of showing his love, these are a connection to a bigger Love, a universal truth. His generous kisses are a gift and a reminder that each of us is loved beyond explanation and without reserve by Someone so very much bigger than any of us can comprehend. I'm grateful to have daily reminders of that Love, mirrored in the face of someone I love so very much.

Faking a Bulletin Board in the Dining Room

2011-04-14T17:21:00.000-07:00

We used to have this strange blank space in our dining room, in one of those awkward spots; large enough for a small piece of furniture, yet, the wall space has both a thermostat and a light switch on it. Every time I looked at that wall, I knew I wanted a bulletin board above that little black sideboard, but I couldn't figure out a way to hang it with those two eye sores on the wall. It bugged me for weeks. (This is an approximate "before," I won't even try to lie, this is photoshopped.)

Then I got this idea to fake a bulletin board around the thermostat and light switch. I decided to dismantle a bulletin board that used to be in our bedroom, and re-purpose it. You might remember that bulletin board from this post. The old girl cost about $15 after I DIYed it!

I drew out the basic height and width I wanted the board to be, by using the frame I had as a guide. Then I bought some cork (it comes in 12x12 inch squares) from Target, and nailed them on the wall in that space. I cut the cork to fit around the light switch and the thermostat.

Here's what the space looked like after I'd finished with the cork. It doesn't matter that the outline is a bit messy because that is about to get covered up by the frame.

I nailed a couple of nails on either side of the cork to match up with the hangers in the frame. This allows the frame to hang around the cork. See, now the messiness is all covered up!

Once that was all done, decorated my bulletin board with a calendar and other essentials, turning this area into a little command center in this awkward space sitting right near the kitchen.

Now our phone, mail "stuff," scissors, pens, all have a home! I got that little mail sorter at HomeGoods for about $20.00 and that cute pen holder? It's a toothbrush holder from Walmart that cost about $8. I love how it looks there, and it keeps everything handy. And, the black cupboard was a FREE "roadkill" item, it was discarded in our last apartment complex and we picked it up.

I'm so excited that I found a way to get a bulletin board into this space, and I love how the light switch and thermostat just blend in with everything else going on there.

I linked this post to:
http://todayscreativeblog.net/
http://bellabeforeandafter.blogspot.com/
http://linda-coastalcharm.blogspot.com/
http://thrifty101.blogspot.com/

Prayer Available Here

2011-04-13T21:59:00.000-07:00

Awhile back, I was walking around a small town near where I grew up hoping to take some pictures for the "Blogging Your Way" Class I was taking. It was raining, and most of the shops were closed. But, I found this inviting sign in a shop window. I like to think that Someone was reminding me to stop trying so hard, and just go with the flow. After all, it seems like you find the best things when you're not really looking for them.

Gluten Intolerance Discussed in the Wall Street Journal

2011-04-11T21:47:00.000-07:00

Some of of you who have been reading for awhile may recall that I am gluten free. I cut all wheat out of my diet about two years ago after having an myriad of strange health issues which included migraines, severe bloating, intestinal distress (along with very loud stomach noises, possibly the most embarrassing issue). I had a hunch that the symptoms were somehow related to sugar and possibly wheat, and then after doing a lot of research, I discovered something called Fructose Malabsorption. Basically, my body can't break down fructose. There's fructans in wheat, which break down to fructose, so people with Fructose Malabsorption can eat varying amounts of wheat. I cut it out entirely for about a year and now I have some once and a while.

In my research, I found that the vast majority of people who believe they have Fructose Malabsorption (sometimes referred to as Fructmal - read more about it here or here.) are self diagnosed. Most doctors I speak to have never heard of it, and even in the hospital (when I was having Zoom) there was a lot of confusion around what it meant to be gluten free - and this was with dietitians!! One day the mysteriously were giving me meals without any ... dairy... because someone got confused in the kitchen.

It's been a real delight and relief to see gluten free products go mainstream over the last year. Target carries an amazing array of gluten free foods, and even Bisquick has made a gluten free version! Let me tell you, that caused a ripple of excitement in the gluten free community :)

My Mom noticed this very cool article in the Wall Street Journal, "Clues to Gluten Sensitivity". New research has been done around people who have problems digesting gluten and they've discovered there is a distinctly different physiological response to gluten amongst those people who are intolerant. And, it's different from those with Celiac, and different from those in the "normal" population. What's even more fascinating is that they've discovered that there is also a different immune response towards gluten amongst those with a sensitivity.

Here are some of the key points of the story:
- As many as 1 in 20 Americans may have some form of gluten sensitivity.
- Common symptoms are "IBS-like stomach problems, headaches, fatigue, numbness and depression, but more than 100 symptoms have been loosely linked to gluten intake, which is why it has been so difficult to study."
- It appears that gluten sensitivity triggers an immune response where the body attacks gluten, causing inflammation, which can migrate and spread, even to the brain.
- Some people with a sensitivity may be able to tolerate small amounts of gluten.
- The story ends in saying gluten sensitivity is a real medical issue, and people with it aren't crazy.

I find the study and its findings to ring true with what I've experienced. I had severe migraines for a couple of years before I gave up gluten, and I haven't had more than couple in the last 15 months (after I gave up gluten). I often wondered if there was a link to inflammation, as I seem to be very sensitive to it. I'm really pleased that there seems to be more research going on around the issue, and I'm super hopeful that more will be found out about gluten sensitivity.

Here's the video that goes along with the Wall Street Journal story: